


This Could Be Just Like Heaven (Don't Throw It All Away)

by Freerangeegghead



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-11
Updated: 2018-02-23
Packaged: 2019-03-16 20:02:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 28,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13643448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Freerangeegghead/pseuds/Freerangeegghead
Summary: Summary: In which Beca Mitchell gets the life she's always dreamed of and more, but realizes maybe it's not all it's cracked up to be. Rated T M. Pitch Perfect. Pairing [Chloe Beale, Beca Mitchell], slight A/U, general, fantasy





	1. 1

_**This Could Be Just Like Heaven (Don't Throw It All Away)** _

_**Pairing: Beca Mitchell, Chloe Beale** _

_**Movie: Pitch Perfect (series)** _

_**Rating/Warnings: T ~ M, no smut, femslash, slightly A/U, mentions of canon.** _

_**Disclaimer: Nothing owned, nothing gained, only prose is mine.** _

_**Summary: In which Beca Mitchell gets the life she wants but realizes maybe it's not all it's cracked up to be.** _

* * *

Chapter 1

Beca Mitchell almost misses the plane by a second.

Almost.

But the cab driver seemed almost like something straight out of a "Fast and the Furious" movie, hitting the gas and slamming on the breaks furiously, shifting gears like his life depended on it, ignoring traffic lights and the annoyed drivers he passes by. The palm trees are a blur, the cars and shoppers and shops selling designer products are a blur, she sees the famous "Hollywood" sign from afar.

In what seems like seconds, in which she feels like her life seems to have flashed before her eyes, she is at the airport, private jet waiting, tiny, impatient pop star, publicist, manager, and massive, muscled, impassive pop star bodyguard in tiny, black shirt, glasses and jeans and the rest of the entourage waiting.

She gets out of the cab, instructing the cab driver to "wait here" while the driver triumphantly says, "Told ya I'd take you here fast."

They meet half-way,blonde pop star in glasses and entourage and her, bodyguard taking the flash drive from her at a snap of the finger from the pop star. Another snap of the finger and a large pair of Beatz headphones are handed to her along with a Mac book. No sound is made as the Mac book is opened, flash drive inserted and Beca's mix is played to said pop star.

Pop star says nothing. Her face - smooth, made up to within an inch of its life, with an aquiline nose and icy blue eyes - expressionless, intent on the song. No one else says anything and it is as if time itself has stopped. Beca realizes her heart has been hammering away in her chest since the pop star had her manager call Beca's agent and a request to make another demo for her new album. The first time pop star asked Beca to collaborate with her, Beca had been thrilled. This was it. Her big break. Professional validation. Before this she'd been mixing and playing in clubs and doing tours and establishing a reputation in the underground as the next hotshot DJ. Her name and music started popping up in blogs, videos, social media, even reddit, being discussed along with other DJs as one of the up-and-coming artists, generating a buzz that was making her agent very, very happy. What they needed, her agent said, was a big name star who would attach herself to Beca and her projects, somebody to validate her. Her agent had been working on introducing her to these famous musicians and she'd had no luck until pop star came along and heard an earlier bootleg mix of Beca's.

Beca'd been surprised that pop star showed any interest in her music at all. Pop star (her agent had asked her to stop referring to their paycheck as "pop star" to which Beca had snarkily said someone who insists on calling themselves Kitty Fantastique instead of a real name would have to just settle to being referred to as pop star instead - an answer that earned her an eye roll) was not only interested, she wanted to collaborate. Beca hadn't wanted to at first. Pop star was what you would call a commercially successfully but critically derided and oft-dismissed star whose music was never really ever going to be taken seriously. She made her name via youtube, was signed after placing second in a singing contest, put out her first song, an awful, steaming pile of cow dung entitled "Forgiveness" that had no rhyme or reason behind it and made her first million amidst scathing reviews that called her album a rotten piece of hackneyed shit and her a talentless hack. So you could understand why Beca didn't want to be associated with her. She wanted to be taken seriously. She wanted people to listen to her music. But she also needed exposure and, as her agent said, "Lord knows we need that paycheck". So she did one collaboration with pop star, and that one song became a worldwide hit and made pop star, Beca, both their agents and their recording companies very, very happy.

They were now on their nth album, and Beca had moved on to work with other artists - DJ Khaled, Alesso, Mark Ronson, Pharell Williams, Timbaland and her favorite, David Guetta, and had artists like Taylor Swift, Demi Lovato, Selena Gomez, and Justin Timberlake feature her music in their albums. She'd gotten song-writing and producing credits on some of those songs, even won a Grammy or two for those. Now she's working on helping produce an album for pop star and though they've worked enough man-hours for Beca to feel comfortable, working with pop star still made her feel nervous.

But when pop star starts to follow the beat, nod her head,turn to her bodyguard and nod, take off the headphones, smile and announce to everyone, including Beca, "I think we got another hit on our hands people!" Beca breathes a sigh of relief. When pop star says, "Good job, Beca," Beca just smiles.

As everyone heads back to the plane (pop star has some kind of interview or concert somewhere in Europe) pop star pulls Beca back. Beca wonders why but then she looks at pop star and pop star can't look her in the eye. Pop star quietly says, "Listen, um, I know you don't think much of me but...do you wanna go out for drinks or something...?" When Beca doesn't say anything, pop star rambles on, a bit defensively, "It's not like a date- _date_  or anything, I just think you're really talented and I'd really like it if we could be friends..." The last part trails off as it is said shyly by the girl.

But Beca doesn't do friendships. She makes music and she makes money, that's it. That's what her million-dollar house with the pool and the studio and the car is all about. That's what this is all about. So she shakes her head and tells pop star, "I don't really do drinks with people I work with, sorry."

As she walks away from crestfallen pop star, her agent calls and Beca tells him she's got another project with pop star. When she adds, as an afterthought, that pop star asked her out for drinks she could almost see his eyeroll as he says, "She's always had a crush on you."

Beca ignores that as she gets into the cab (she curses the shop for not fixing her SUV sooner). She gives the cab directions back to her Beverly Hills home.

"...So..." Her agent starts by way of introducing a new topic.

"What?" She asks.

"Any plans for Christmas?"

Beca doesn't answer right away, annoyed at the question. "Nothing. Probably stay at home and work on my mixes."

"Hey, don't you have a dad and a stepmom...?"

"Who are halfway across the country," Beca cuts in. "No way I'm going to fly all the way there on the red eye just to see them."

"But it's Christmas eve," her agent says. "You've gotta take a break, too. Lord knows you've earned it. We've worked long and hard for this, maybe you should slow down a bit..."

"Exactly why I should get started on this new project,"Beca says.

The agent laughs. " Sure, sure 'cause you know there's always a new up-and-coming artist just waiting to snatch the number spot away from you if you disappeared even for a minute in the charts..."

"I don't appreciate your sarcasm," Beca says as her agent chuckles. "Weren't you the one who said hard work always trumps talent if talent isn't willing to work hard?"

"I know, I know," her agent says in a conciliatory tone. "And I'm happy you're working hard enough that we don't have to rock the casbah so we can afford ski trips and pay for holidays and staff..."

"Your point being...?"

"You gotta get a life, Beca..." Agent says.

"I have a life!" Beca insists.

"... In fact you need a love life," agent says.

"I have a like life it suits me fine."

"Your dusty, old uterus isn't getting any younger.."

"What is your point, Bill?"

"My point is,Beca, there's more to life than the relentless pursuit for the next worldwide and the next paycheck," Bill the agent says. "I think you need to slow down a bit, stop and smell the roses...life's short. You don't want to die wishing you'd done something more with your life."

"Now you sound like my dad,"Beca mutters.

"I'm not trying to sound like anything," Bill says, "But yes, I'm just a little bit concerned about this workaholic work ethic you've got going there. It's really disturbing."

"That disturbing work ethic is paying for your next ski trip, that new jacuzzi you wanted in your backyard and those new boobs your wife wanted..."

"Hey! I'm hurt you think I'm just staying with you for the money.."

Beca laughed. "Money that you enjoy spending Bill. Don't tell me I'm not making you happy. I just made you a shit-ton of money last Christmas. And I am doing something with my life. I'm making hits. I'm churning out hits. I'm touching people's lives."

"You say that like the cynical Millenial you are," Bill, ever observant, says. "Are you even happy at all?"

"I  _am_  happy, Bill."

"You sure?"

"Sure. I've got everything I could ask for. I can spend what I want, on what I want, do what I want...I'm on top of the world. Hell, I'm over the moon...I'm..."

"Right," Bill the agent says in tone that says he is not entirely convinced Beca is telling the truth. "You sure about that?"

"Yeah."

"You're really sure?"

"Yes Bill I'm sure." Beca laughs. "Stop psycho-analyzing me,Bill."

"Alright, honey," Bill says. "Then I guess you get what you asked for. Just remember, money isn't everything. Money  _can't_  buy everything."

Beca laughs. "Whatever,  _dad._  Good night,Bill."

"Good night, Beca," Bill says. " Stay safe out there. And don't do too many drugs" - to which Beca laughs - "Hope you like your present."

* * *

Beca fiddles around in her expensive, newly renovated recording studio, playing around with beats and rhythm and some old 80s and 90s tracks, thick headphone on her ears. She'd sent Maria, the housekeeper home, so it is just her, microwave and eggnog and wine for Christmas eve. In the back, an old television set is playing "It's a Wonderful Life" - she isn't really paying attention, she just wants some white noise playing in the background. The whole house, the whole neighborhood is quiet tonight, celebrating Christmas eve in Switzerland, Aspen, the Carribean, or wherever it is that other rich people go to for Christmas.

Beca glances at the clock on the wall - two minutes to midnight, to Christmas day - she takes off her headset, leans back on her swivel chair, rubs her eyes and grabs another glass of wine. If she's really being honest, she's actually a bit drunk on wine and high on weed.

She takes out a note left on the table by Maria. Maria had written a note about somebody named "Kloe Bill" calling to ask for Beca Mitchell and if Beca could give her a call.

She'd not thought of her and the other Bellas til now. In fact, she wouldn't have thought of them had Chloe not called her.  She'd briefly wondered why Chloe would call her now, after all these years. She'd not thought of her, of the other Bellas in so long. She wonders where they are after the Bellas and Barden. Did they get the lives they want? Are they happy? Successful? Do they have families? Careers? Is it all they've ever imagined it to be? Out of the blue she wonders where Chloe is. She hadn't spoken to her since she graduated and had gone on to vet school.

She takes out her phone, goes over facebook and finds a photo shared by Fat Amy taken some years ago. It's a photo taken right after their first win at Nationals. All the Bellas are there. Aubrey, Fat Amy, Lilly,Stacie, Cynthia Rose, Ashley and Jessica. And there, right in the middle, is her.

She doesn't know why but her eyes, previously blurry from alcohol and weed, suddenly clear up, and all she can see is a red-headed, blue eyed woman smiling at the camera, smiling at her.

Chloe. Chloe Beale.

She closes her eyes and thinks about her for awhile. 

She'd been so beautiful then. 

She wonders briefly if she's still beautiful now.

Suddenly the clock chimes 12 midnight, and her eyes fly open. Now why'd she suddenly think of Chloe? And think of Chloe like that? Strange. 

She sigh, decides to call it a night, gets up, lurches to her room, muttering drunkenly herself as she makes her way up the long and winding stairs why the studio is so far from her bedroom. She looks around the sweeping, tiled living room, the overpriced couch, the overall expensively decorated house and she wonders how she ler her real estate agent and interior decorator talk her into buying a so-out-of-character, so very adult expensive house in the Hills with a pool and immaculately cut Bermuda grass - that is as empty as it is depressing - a testament to the wealth she has amassed churning out pop hits for pop star and company - and also a testament to the increasing loneliness she feels right now.

She stops.  _Oh my god_ , she thinks,  _Why would I feel lonely? I'm rich, I'm successful, I'm accomplished, I've got everything I've ever wanted, what more could I ask for?_

She shakes thede thoughts from her mind, resolves not to have a pity party again, makes a beeline to her room, strips herself down to her tank top and underwear and crashes on her ultrasoft bed with its threadcount appropriate sheets.

In a few seconds she falls asleep.

* * *

Beca is rudely jolted out of a deep, dreamless sleep by an alarm clock. She groans, thinking she doesn't remember setting an alarm clock for Christmas day (who sets an alarm clock for Christmas day?) The first thing Beca feels is a slight cold coming into the bed and a mild irritation at being rudely awakened. Groggily she wonders why the room smells vaguely of lavender, and why there is a weight on her chest, and something tickling her stomach. She rubs her eyes, and her temples, feeling a slight headache coming on.

Suddenly she hears a voice mumbling from below her, on her stomach, saying "Five more minutes, please..."

Then her eyes fly open and she sees someone with a wild flurry of curly, bright red hair lying on top of her. At first she wonders what a woman is doing on top of her, but then the woman shifts, and she feels somebody's arms snake around her (is she hugging Beca? She looks down. Yes, she's hugging her). She realizes at about the same time that the woman may also possibly be naked beneath the blanket, judging by her warm skin against Beca's body and Beca feels herself blush and turn warm all over. But before she could process all of this, a little ball of red-headed energy bounds up on the bed and starts screaming "It's Christmas, it's Christmas! Get up mommy! Get up mama!" Followed by a barking dog.

The woman on top of her sighs, rolls over and says resignedly, "Too late..." Before sitting up and grabbing the child jumping up and down the bed.

Beca does a double take, her eyes widen and she almost falls off the bed when she realizes who it is.

"Chloe? Chloe Beale?" She stares at Chloe.

Chloe, in a top and short shorts, turns around and grins, "Nobody's called me that in years, but sure..." She stops. Looks at Beca. " What? You're drooling."

Beca blushes. "No, I...sorry... It's just... Wow, you look...hot...like super hot."

Chloe grins. "I know. But thanks. You kept telling me that last night, too." Chloe winks at her and gives her a mischievous wicked smile that makes Beca know exactly what they were doing last night. Beca blushes even more.

Oblivious, Chloe just starts fussing all over the little girl.

"Morning, mom!" The little girl in Chloe's arms says before they both leave the room. "Merry Christmas!"

"Coffee, strong coffee," Chloe mutters as they both make their way to the kitchen, dog in tow.

Beca stands there, in what appears to be  _not_  her bedroom in L.A., she

looks out and it's snowing and it's  _not_  L.A. and she looks at her left hand and catches a glimpse of a gold wedding band and she realizes she's married. She's seen the same gold ring in Chloe's ring finger, too. So she's married. To Chloe Beale.

She feels the first stages of a major panic attack coming on.

Oh no, this can't be happening, I have a million dollar contract meeting with Sony Music, a meeting with Justin Timberlake, why am I here? Oh god...

She feels nauseated, feels dizzy and feels like she is going to pass out.

What is she going to do?

She is doomed.

 _Doomed_.

Her life is over.


	2. 2

Chapter 2

 _I can_ _'t believe this is happening to me_ , Beca says as she grabs jeans, sweatshirt (Barden, smelling of lavender, possibly Chloe's?) and Chucks and rushes downstairs to the surprise of Chloe, little girl and a…baby? (oh my god, she thinks, they have a baby?) and two unidentified older people in their sixties drinking coffee with Chloe in the kitchen, people that are decidedly not her parents and so she assumes might be the neighbors.

When she steps out of the house, she realizes it is cold as fuck and rushes back in to grab jacket, boots, hat and car keys. A look at the mirror later reveals that she is wearing a thick winter jacket, a Russian-looking winter hat and thick, winter boots.  _I look like an L.L. Bean winter catalogue,_  she thinks.

She looks out over the snow-filled landscape, searches for her car and says, out loud, "Where's my Spyder?"

She hears a voice behind her asking, "Where's your what now?"

Beca turns. "My Spyder! " Beca demands, exasperated. "My Spyder! My $ 200,000 Audi R8 Spyder!"

The middle-aged, red-headed, immaculately coiffed woman just stares at her, steaming mug of coffee cradled in her hand. There is silence between them in which Beca feels herself cower before the woman, thinking to herself how like Chloe the woman is - is it possible this could possibly be her mother in law? Then the woman chides her, "I'm sorry, would you like to run that question by me again?" in a tone that tells Beca she isn't really impressed with her behavior right now.

Beca says, "I'm sorry, I have a car. It's a $ 200, 000 Audi R8 Spyder powered by a 5.2 liter 540 hp v-10 plus which makes 610 hp. It goes from zero to 60 mph in 3.2 seconds, with a power of 540 hp at 8700 rpm and…"

"Wow, $ 200, 000. For that kind of money, I'd buy an island in the Bahamas."

Chloe comes up from behind the older woman and says, "Wow, didn't figure you for a motorhead, honey…"

Beca closes her eyes, takes a deep breath, hopes this is all a bad dream, opens her eyes and asks, "For the last time, has anyone seen my Audio R8 Spyder…?" Beca ignores the little girl, the little boy and the old man looking at her by the kitchen window.

Chloe rolls her eyes. "Are you high? There's the car out there."

"Where?" Beca asks, looking around.

Chloe points. "There."

When Beca sees it, her head whips around, her eyes widen and she turns back to Chloe, "That car?!"

"Yes,  _that_  car," Chloe responds triumphantly.

"That  _car_?!" Beca repeats in disbelief.

She steps out into the snow and shouts, " _ **That car**_?!"

The older woman leans in to whisper to Chloe, "Honey, does she think if she says it too many times in as many different tones as she can, it will make that hideous car go away?"

"Mom, don't start," Chloe murmurs.

"I don't know about you, honey, but she makes a pretty good Nicolas Cage impression."

Beca glares at her mother. To Beca she says, "Yeah, that's what I thought, too, the first time we saw it."

"This car looks like a hearse!" Beca shouts back.

"You wanted to buy it!" Chloe shouts back.

"Where is this place anyway?" Beca asks.

"New Jersey," Chloe replies.

Beca's eyes widen. " _New_ Jersey?! New _Jersey_?!  _New Jersey_?!" Beca says over and over again before she looks up at the sky and shouts, " _ **NEW JERSEY?!**_ "

"What's up with her?" Chloe's mom asks.

Chloe shrugs.

As Beca slips and walks to the car, grumbling and mumbling and struggling to open the car, Chloe's mom says, "Told you to pick the other one."

Chloe rolls her eyes. "Well, I picked this one, so get over it."

Her mom laughs and puts her arm around her. "I'm over it. But things like this? Never gets old," she says as she watches Beca wrestle with the car door, successfully wrench it away, slam it shut, try to start the car a few times, before it finally starts with an explosion, a puff of black smoke, and a horrible, coughing, gurgling engine noise, making everyone watching wince and the neighborhood dogs start barking. "Think we should bury your car? It looks like it's about to die… on Beca…"

Chloe pouts. "Stop it, mom."

As Beca pulls out of the driveway, Chloe shouts, "Hey, where you going? It's Christmas day!"

But Beca doesn't even look at her as she backs out of the drive way, pulls into the road and drives away.

The old man comes up from behind them and asks, face comically impassive, "Think she'll come back?"

Chloe's mom grins. "Wouldn't that be the greatest..."

"Mom!" Chloe chides her.

The old man looks at Chloe. "She's still got freakishly tiny arms. And tiny feet. And tiny fingers."

Chloe glares at him. "Stop it, dad."

"...Don't forget flat-chested," Chloe's mom adds.

Chloe rolls her eyes. "I can't believe I'm related to you guys."

Chloe's dad grins and gives Chloe a bear hug. "You love it. She's coming back. Maybe she forgot something at the store. C'mon, let's open some presents."

Chloe's mom rolls her eyes, too. "Oh, god, with any luck I'll get me some more China."

"I thought you loved the last one we bought you last year," Chloe asks as they go inside and close the door.

"I lied."

"What do you mean there are no flights available?" Beca demands of the person behind the desk at the airport in Newark.

"For the last time, ma'am, all flights have been fully booked, there are no available flights anymore," the woman in the scarf and blue flight attendant suit that looks a lot like the Barden Bella outfit says. "And I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't use a tone with me, ma'am. We're doing the best we can."

"Everything okay here?" a bald, hulking airport security resembling Vin Diesel with a Jersey accent materializes out of nowhere.

Beca looks up at the Vin Diesel look-alike, contemplates strangling him and the flight attendant before she steps back and says, "Yep, everything is fine. Sorry. Leaving now." _Stupid overbooked airline,_  she thinks as she leaves in a huff.

* * *

Minutes later, she is sitting by the curb, a few meters from the airport, unable to breathe, hyperventilating, panic, anxiety, fear, despair and a number of other emotions going over her.

"This isn't happening," she mutters. "This isn't actually fucking happening." If I close my eyes, and count to ten, I will wake up and I'll realize it's all a bad dream, just a bad dream and I'll be in L.A. and it's going to be okay, she tells herself over and over again, rocking herself back and forth, huddled and shivering by the curb. She opens her eyes and sees the same thing: unfamiliar snow-filled streets, cars, buses, people wrapped in winter clothes, clutching shopping bags to themselves. Nope, still in fucking Jersey, she tells herself. "I am in the fucking seventh circle of hell."

Suddenly, a hand with a paperbag appears in front of her. "Here," a voice says. "Breathe into this. Deep breaths. Deep breaths."

She gets the paperbag from the hand, mutters a thanks, before she starts to take breaths into the bag.

The figure sits beside her and starts to chant, "Sun is going down, sun is going down… Stay calm, sun is going down..."

Beca lets out an irritated noise. " The fuck you on about..." But thens she turns and does a double take. "Amy? Fat Amy?"

Fat Amy, former college friend and Barden team mate, beams. "In the flesh! And you say my name like it's a bad thing."

"What are you doing here? How'd you know I was here."

"Dunno, really," Fat Amy says, shrugging. "Maybe Chloe just happened to call me all frantic and panicky wondering where you are probably had something to do it. Dude, your wife can really be something."

"See, see? That's the other thing...Chloe is my wife? How is that even possible? We weren't a thing in college...I don't recall us ever hooking up or..."

"Beats me, mate, all I know is one day you call me up and you tell me you tied the knot with Chloe..."

"No,no,no," Beca insists. "You don't understand. This isn't supposed to be happening. I'm not supposed to be here. That house in Jersey? Those kids? Chloe? They're not mine."

Fat Amy turns to her, looks at her steadily and seems to have decided to humor her because she says, "How do you figure?"

"I dropped out."

"Of what exactly?"

"Of Barden!" Beca says in exasperation. "I never finished college. Didn't even finish freshman year. Bought the next ticket out to L.A. Found a job. Did some gigs for awhile. Cut my teeth in the underground clubbing scene til I got signed by a major label, scored hits and got rich."

"What do you mean?" Fat Amy asks, "You never graduated? We were never roomies? You never went to the World Competition with us to battle Das Sound Machine? Never went on that USO tour? Never saw me in what is now infamously called Wrecking Ball Gate?"

Beca stares at her incredulously. "No. And okay not proud I didn't graduate, my dad was furious and hasn't spoken to me in years but yes. And you went to a World Competition? 'Cause I don't think that's a thing. And I'm surprised they let college kids who sing acapella go on a USO tour. Is that even a thing?"

"Yep, any excuse to entertain the troops, and no, don't think it's an actual thing," Fat Amy says. "My dad almost ruined it. And some guys chasing us. I try not to forget we were even part of that USO tour. But I like that somewhere in an alternate reality I didn't have to expose myself to the President of the United States."

Beca looks at her. "You exposed yourself?"

"And not in a good way. The president was not very happy about that I can tell you that," Fat Amy says. "Almost thought I was gonna get deported."

Something suddenly dawns on Beca. "Wait, hold up, you said something about alternate realities..."

"Yeah, about that..."

"So it's possible this is just an alternate dimension and I can just go back to my own reality?"

Fat Amy thinks about it for some time before saying, "Yeah it's possible. But what is reality, you know? How do you even know what's real and what's not? How do you know the other reality is real and this is not? Maybe this is real and the other one is not. Or maybe reality is just overrated. Maybe it's an illusion. Maybe it's relative. Maybe your so-called reality is another one's illusion. Maybe we are all living inside our own fantasies and reality does not exist, only perspective. Maybe someone ripped a hole in the space time continuum and all our realities are bleeding together you know?Or maybe it's entirely possible that I've just watched way too many sci-fi movies and I can't.."

Beca stops, thinks about it. "I don't really understand all of that, but can you focus please?"

"Oh,sorry," Fat Amy says. "Look -it's normal to feel this - to feel like you've hit a crisis in your life. You're young, you've got a wife and kids, bills and a mortgage to pay, you're living from paycheck to paycheck and it's easy to think of the what-might-have-beens and what-ifs...but what's done is done okay? You've just gotta get home and face the music...or in this case probably an increasingly angry wife wondering where you are."

"Well, how do I get back?"

"To where?"

"To my fucking life! The other one, not this one. I want to get back and I want to get back now!"

"Easy there, tiger," Fat Amy says. "Calm down. I don't really know how you get back to an idea or an abstraction or whatever it is...but seems to me like there's probably a reason why you're here, and once you've figured that out, you'd probably get back to wherever you're supposed to be."

"Okay, that's not too bad," Beca says. " _When_  do I get back?"

Fat Amy shrugs. "Beats me. Although I don't know why you're so excited to go back to this so-called exciting life you have somewhere else. Seems to me like you already got a pretty sweet deal here - a wife, kids, family, the works. Sure you only get to sleep with just the one person the rest of your life and you'll probably never get to have sex as often as you wanted and you'll probably be saddled with mortgage and loans and debts but hey, you're okay. Maybe you should enjoy this til it ends, huh? Take it easy for a while. Stop and smell those fucking roses or some such shit."

Beca stops. "Wait, what?"

"What?"

"What did you just say?"

"You'll probably never get to have sex as often as you want?"

"No, no, the one about the roses..."

"Oh, yeah, stop and smell those fucking roses...?"

"Bill told me something like that," Beca says.  _Bill, you asshole, if I find out you've got something to do with this_...

"Anyway, whaddya say? Care to come back with me and face the music?" Fat Amy says, getting up and extending a hand to Beca.

Beca looks up, looks at Fat Amy, stares at her hand, wonders what she will do next.

"I don't know what's gonna happen, mate, but I can promise you, it's gonna be one hell of a fucking ride..."

Beca keeps looking at her, unsure what to do next.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Yup, it's from that movie, title taken from OST of same. More reviews welcome.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"Where were you?" Chloe demands the second she gets into the house.

Beca is so taken aback she doesn't know what to say. She turns around and sees Fat Amy has already disappeared. She could swear she was here only a second ago. The in-laws have also seemed to have disappeared. She looks at Chloe and sees that her eyes are puffy and red, she is clutching what seems to be a roll of tissue and she looks utterly worried.

"Where've you been?" Chloe asks again.

"I…"

"I was worried  _sick_ about you," Chloe continues. "I thought you'd been in an accident or something…"

"I'm…sorry…?"

"Sorry?  _Sorry?_ " Chloe asks, incredulous. "You missed Christmas Day and you missed your kids opening the presents you spent hours lining up for and you've got me, the kids and mom and dad worried sick about you and all you have to say is you're sorry?"

Beca doesn't know what to say. She feels a headache coming on. Did Chloe always sound high-pitched when she's upset? She doesn't remember. She does realize this is exactly the reason she doesn't do relationships. Jesse had that same high-pitched whining tone she disliked when they were together.

"I'm… _really_  sorry?"

Chloe just stares at her in disbelief. "Ugh, you're incorrigible you know that?" She looks at Beca. "What were you doing anyway?"

Beca looks at Chloe, debates whether she should tell her the truth or not. But she looks at Chloe and Chloe looks upset right now, and she wonders what Chloe would do if she told her she thinks she's in a dream. "I was...just…I don't know…? Thinking…?"

Chloe sniffs, wipes at her nose, takes a step toward Beca, peers into her eyes and asks, "Of what…?"

Chloe is looking at her so intently Beca doesn't think honesty is the best policy right now. "Of things…"

"What things?"

Seriously, Chloe looking at her with those deep, deep, piercing, ocean blue eyes is making Beca feel a little bit naked, and maybe a bit vulnerable. She thinks she can't really look Chloe in the eye right now. Afraid she might drown in her baby blues. So she focuses on something outside of Chloe's eyes, the freckles on her nose, which makes her a bit cross-eyed, so she focuses on Chloe's lips instead, and Beca notices how when Chloe bites her lower lip that there is something slightly sexy about it. Then she stops.  _Wait, what?_ She thinks,  _hold up, sexy?_ Did she just find Chloe sexy? Not that she isn't, she is, she's hot in fact, even with two kids (she assumes Chloe is the birth mother and not her because eeww) but still, she's hot and…

She stops when she sees Chloe glare at her.

 _Focus, Beca, focus, what is wrong with you?_   _Distracted by apparent wife in short shorts and top and bathrobe,_  she thinks to herself.  _Those smooth legs seem to go on for days._   _Crap, am I a horny teenager in this reality?_ She asks herself as she blushes at Chloe.

"Well…?" Chloe asks.

"Just… I don't know,  _things_ ," Beca mutters, lamely, unable to look Chloe in the eye or stop staring at her body.

"Things." Chloe says it like a statement, but Beca's heard that tone before, it's Chloe's exasperated, "I've-had-it-up-to-here" tone, it's the tone she has when she's about to attack someone. This is exactly what happened to Aubrey that one time right before Nationals.

"Just  _things_ …!" Beca says, evasive. "Is it wrong to want to have some…space…? Some privacy? To just think and…stuff?" Beca wants to kick herself. Even to her it sounds pathetic.

Chloe just glares at her, trying to figure out what she just said. They stand there, not saying anything, until finally, Chloe throws up her hands and says, "I don't know what game you think you're playing with me, but alright, fine, whatever. But don't go disappearing on me like that again, like you did last time. It freaked me out, too."

Last time? Beca wonders. She decides to file that under "will-find-out-about-this-later" folder as she watches Chloe.

"...Anyway, you've been gone so long we don't have time anymore, you've got to get ready."

"Get ready for what?"

"The party," Chloe says. "That's why Fat Amy is here. We're meeting up with the others at the pub. It's kind of like a tradition."

"Maybe I shouldn't go."

"What? You love these parties. You look forward to it every year," Chloe says. "Alright, fine, then I'll just have to cancel with mom and dad and tell them they don't need to babysit the kids since you're not going…"

At that point, the little girl wanders into the kitchen and little boy, in his stroller, follow after her, drool all over his face, hands and arms as he gurgles and giggles. Chloe's face light up when she sees them, as she grabs the phone.

"On second thought, I'm coming with," Beca quickly says as she bolts out of there.

* * *

"You have  _got_ to be kidding me," Beca mutters to herself when she opens the closet and sees jeans, tee shirts, sweatshirts and all the accouterments of someone who is a mom. Gone are the Armani, Chanel, Gucci, Vuitton, Prada and Valentino designer clothes she wears, only to be replaced by what she thinks are married mom clothes. She's married, she has kids, she's in the 'burbs. She sighs. "Welcome back, nerd."

She senses somebody looking at her and when she turns it's the little girl, head cocked to one side - which - she really has to learn the name of her supposed children, this is just beyond pathetic. As Beca goes over the choice of clothes (choices: nerdy, geeky, dorky, repeat) she can sense the girl watching her every move, and when she turns, the girl asks, innocently, "Are you really my mom?" Before she can answer, the girl lets out a little shriek, as if she's just said something she's not supposed to, turns and runs to her own bedroom. Beca hears a click and she thinks,  _great, my own flesh and blood is afraid of me_. But then she catches herself and she thinks,  _Stop it, she isn't actually your child, you know._

* * *

She shouldn't have come. She should have just stayed home wiping snot and shit from her kids.

She completely regrets coming to this party. She'd forgotten how awkward these reunions are - from meeting apparently anyone who's survived Barden, acapella or college life in general - Cynthia Rose, Stacie, Lilly and of course Fat Amy,Benji and Bumper (noticeably absent Jessica, Ashley, Aubrey and Jesse), some tall German lady named Komissar who Beca finds a little scary and who, based on how the other Bellas tease her,she had a thing for before to catching up with everyone (Fat Amy spends nights singing for an Amy Winehouse cover band, Stacie is a stay-at-home mom,Lilly is being Lilly - she briefly wonders what Chloe does for a living) to realizing in the space of a few seconds how sad and pathetic things are now compared to before when they were all still young and hopeful. Whoa, there Beca, cynical much? She thinks.

As her friends - were they really her friends to begin with? She wonders - laugh and chatter and catch up amidst the smell of beer and smoke - a girl shyly wanders up to her and talks to her. "Hey, Beca. How are you?"

Beca says, "Hey,hi. I'm fine. Do I know you?"

The girl blushes. "Um, yeah, Emily? We worked on a song together."

When Beca's face is still a blank, Emily continues, "For World's? We worked on a set list."

Beca doesn't really know,but she nods. "Oh,yeah, cool."

Emily smiles nervously. "Um, yeah, you look really nice."

Beca looks at her clothes. "Yeah, it's crap,but it's what I could come up with on such short notice."

Emily laughs. "I don't think you could ever make anything crappy. You could wear a trash bag over your body and you'd still look good." Then she stops, blushes, realizes she's said too much, glances around and sees Chloe happily chattering away with the others. She lowers her voice as she asks, "Maybe we could have some coffee or whatever sometime?"

"Yeah, sure whatever." Beca cranes her neck to look at Chloe and the others, already forgetting Emily.

She makes a bee line to Chloe, briefly thinking how beautiful she looks in the dress and wonders how she would look like out of it (she blushes at the thought) and catches Chloe saying "... And then I told her, yeah, zookeepers do it like animals," and they all laugh.

Beca blurts out without thinking "Wait, you're a zookeeper?"

Everyone within earshot stops and looks at Beca. Chloe looks at her like she's grown a third head.

Beca continues, "You're a zookeeper. Like, you work in a zoo, at, like, minimum wage rates and stuff?"

Chloe doesn't answer her, just stares at her in disbelief.

Fat Amy sidles quietly up to Beca then and says, "You wanna go out and get some air, yeah? A bit stuff here?"

Beca just looks at her, says nothing, and stalks off.

* * *

Chloe doesn't speak to her for the rest of the night, only once telling her, between gritted teeth, "I don't know what's going on with you today but I'd appreciate it if you didn't embarass me and yourself infront of our friends and everybody else" before walking off to their bedroom and slamming it.

Beca sleeps on the couch that night.

* * *

Beca wakes up the next day with a headache, a bad back ache and a crying child screaming in her ear. She looks and it's the baby monitor by her head. What the fuck, seriously? She mutters to herself as she gets up, drags her feet up the stairs, hears the baby's screaming, which is louder on the second floor, goes into their bedroom (unlocked, thankfully), finds no one there, but she hears the shower and so assumes Chloe is in there.

She should have knocked, of course. But she opens the bathroom door assuming Chloe is putting on make-up but she is, instead, treated to a full visual of a fully naked Chloe behind the glass doors of their small shower room dancing and singing a David Guetta song playing on her iPhone ( _Is that Titanium?_ _Y_ _es, it is_ ) that makes her blush a bit at the realization of what Titanium is in relation to Chloe's life. She tries to catch Chloe's attention, but the singing and the iPhone is loud, so she goes for a much louder "Hey!" that makes Chloe stop, turn, slide the door open and give Beca an even fuller view of her body in all its naked glory. Beca's blush deepens.

"What?" Chloe demands. "What are you screaming about?"

"The…baby…it's screaming," Beca says lamely, feeling shy and embarrassed. "Are you gonna take care of that."

Chloe snorts. "Don't think you're off the hook for that stunt you pulled last night. Still mad at you. Still not doing it. It's your turn to do it. Don't forget to take the kids to school."

"Wha…?"

But before Beca could finish her protest, Chloe has closed the door and resumed singing.

* * *

Beca stares at the baby staring up at her on the changing table. The baby has blond tufts of hair, rosy, chubby cheeks, equally chubby arms and legs, an arm and a finger of which is currently in said baby's mouth, and the bluest blue eyes of anyone Beca's ever seen, except for Chloe's, and the widest, she thinks mischievous, grin she's ever seen. She tries to ignore the other child with the same blue eyes staring at her from on top of her bed, but it is hard to do, because the girl looks a bit like Chloe and so it feels like Chloe herself is staring at her.

Finally, she turns and says, "Will you stop staring at me please?" Before she turns to the baby, studies it and mutters, "Now, how do we do this? What do we do with you?"

The girl blurts out, "You're not really our mom are you?"

This surprises Beca. "What? No, yes, I mean…" She presses fingers to her forehead. She has had limited interaction with children and so she doesn't really know how to handle them.

The girl jumps off the bed and takes a few tentative steps towards her. "You're not, are you? I mean you  _look_ like her, and you  _sound_  like her, but I don't think you're her. " The girl stares at her so intently and so innocently Beca thinks maybe she should be honest with this one, too.

"No, no, I'm not," she says in a resigned tone, relieved at least that she could admit this to one person.

"What did you do to our other mom?" the girl asks.

"I…nothing," Beca says, shaking her head. "Nothing."

"So where is she?" the girl asks.

Beca shakes her head again and shrugs. "I don't know. I'm as stumped as you are."

The girl looks down at the floor, crestfallen. They stand there, not doing or saying anything, before the girl looks up with tear-filled eyes, and she asks in a small voice, "Are you gonna hurt my brother and me?"

Beca screws up her face. "What? No, no, of course not."

The girl considers this for a while before she looks up again and says, "You promise?"

Beca nods her head, puts up her right hand, and puts it on her heart. "Scout's honor."

The girl considers her face for a few seconds, before she decides that maybe this stranger who may or may not be her mother is telling the truth, pulls up a chair and watches Beca wrestle with the idea of how to change diapers.

"You open it over there," the girl pipes up.

Beca nods and the unmistakably strong smell of poop attacks her nostrils. "Oh, my god, gross," she says, making a face and covering her nose. The baby just starts giggling and then starts to pee on Beca's face, making Beca yelp and jump up and down.

The girl laughs. "Mommy is pretty good at that. She calls it her evasive many overs. He's pretty naughty like that."

Beca frowns at the baby. "Bad baby, bad baby!" She says as she wipes her face with her shirt. The girl giggles again, as she hands Beca wet wipes and a towel. "What's your name anyway?" Beca asks after she's wiped her face with the wet wipe. She carefully folds the soiled diaper, with her index finger and her thumb while holding her breath. The girl points to the trash bin and Beca mouths a thank you to her.

"Colbie," the girl says. "And that's Davey."

Beca nods. "How'd you know it wasn't me?"

Colbie tilts her head, points to the stack of new diapers sitting on the cabinet by the baby's head. Beca takes one and starts to clean the baby up before she puts the diaper on her.

Colbie shrugs. "Dunno. But you didn't seem to know me or Davey and you were looking at mommy funny."

"Looking at mommy funny? What do you mean?"

Colbie shrugs again. "Dunno. Like you'd never seen her before in your life. Or like you've only discovered her now. Or you're only seeing her for the first time."

"Really?" Beca asks.

"Yeah. And I don't know, you guys aren't fighting as much as before," Colbie adds.

"Fighting?" Beca prods. "What do you mean? What would we fight about?"

"I don't know. Stuff, I guess. I don't know. You always fight in your room, but I hear it anyway. Maybe it's a seven years itch."

"An itch?" Beca asks.

"I dunno. Grandma says if two people have been together too long, they get bored or something."

Beca finishes changing the baby's diaper and she looks at Colbie. "What do you think?"

"Yeah, it's okay," Colbie says, eyeing the baby. "If you changed him with your feet."

Beca glares at her. Colbie hops off her chair and says, "You've got to put this thingie on this thingie and then make sure it's wrapped tight on him."

"Oh, okay," Beca says.

"Are you bored with mom?"

Beca looks at Colbie. "Me? No. No.  _No_."

"Are you going to leave mommy?" Colbie continues. "Are you going to divorce her?"

Beca stares at her. "What? No, of course not."

"Promise?" Colbie asks. She offers her pinkie to Beca. " _Pinkie_  promise?" When Beca hesitates, Colbie says, "Mommy says if you pinkie promise then you shouldn't break your promise. Because you pinkie promised."

Beca offers her own pinkie and wraps it on the girl's pinkie. "I pinkie promise."

Colbie beams. "Okay, now we have to go to school." Then she looks Beca over. "After you shower."

* * *

Beca drops off Davey to Day Care then Colbie to school. On their way there, Colbie gives Beca a rundown of things she's supposed to know: bath times, meal times, Colbie's favorite food ("Not peas or bwocolli, please, I hate those", Colbie says), nap times, play times, and so on. "And you're not supposed to use naughty words with us."

"Naughty words?" Beca asks.

Colbie looks scandalized. "You know," she says, in a stage whisper. "Words like," and she spells it out, "S-I-T-H…"

Beca grins. "Sure, I would be very careful of that word, too, the force can be very dangerous."

"I don't know what that means,but yeah. And also, other words like 'Stupid', 'Shut up', 'Poop', 'Dumb', 'Hush' and…"

"Hush?" Beca asks. "How is 'hush' a naughty word?"

"I don't know, mommy says," Colbie insists.

"Then your mommy and I will have a talk about that."

Colbie giggles. "When you say that, mommy laughs and then you guys go into the bedroom for hours and make these funny noises."

Beca blushes. "What? What kind of funny noises?"

Colbie shrugs. "I don't know. But I heard two cats fighting before, and it sounded a bit like that. But I'm not really sure because most times you play music really, really loudly. Like very, very loud."

Beca shakes her head. "I don't think I make funny noises like that." Not sure about Chloe, though, she thinks and isn't sure if she wants to find out.

They are quiet for a while and then Colbie speaks up again. "Oh, and you like to call me Colbiebear and Davey, Daveybear. That's how I figured you weren't our mom."

Beca nods. "What do I call your mommy?"

Colbie shrugs. "I don't know. Because eeww."

Beca laughs. "Well do you know if we have a theme song?" she asks playfully.

Colbie throws up her hand. "I don't know. Am I my mommy's keeper?"

Beca laughs again. "How'd you get to be a smart-as…" she turns to Colbie, realizes she's about to use a naughty word and corrects herself, "Smarty pants?"

Colbie just smiles. "I don't know. I just am."

"What are your grandparents' names?"

"Yours you already know," Colbie says, matter-of-factly. "Mommy's though are Grandma Taylor and Grandpa Daniel."

Beca nods. Mr. and Mrs. Daniel and Taylor Beale. Hmmm...

Colbie waits for Beca to signal and turn left, park and with the car running, get Davey from the backseat.

"You can't hold Davey like that, you have to hold him by the head," Colbie says, to which Beca nods before she rushes out of the car, baby held at arm's length, to drop the baby off at Day Care.

When she comes back in, Colbie continues, "You drop me off at school then you have to be early to pick me up after. 'Cause nobody wants to be the last kid left at school. Last time you forgot to pick me up and I had to stay here til you and mommy realized you forgot me."

Beca snorts. "I'd never forget to pick you up, geez…"

Colbie just looks at her.

"Okay, okay, maybe I'd probably forget, but hey, first time instant parent here."

"Just, don't forget okay?"

"Alright, alright,geez, how old are you?"

"Five," Colbie answers matter-of-factly.

Before Colbie leaves, Beca says, "Colbie…"

Colbie turns and looks at Beca. For a second, Beca is struck by how alike Colbie and Chloe are. Colbie waits for Beca to continue. "What?"

"Um, this is stupid but…where do I work?" Beca asks with a sheepish smile.

Colbie tilts her head to one side. "Imperium."

"Imperium?"

Colbie nods. "Imperium Records. It's not that far. It's just over there."

Beca's smile fades and she feels a sinking feeling in her gut.

"I work at a record store?"

Colbie nods.

"A record store?" Beca asks, in disbelief.

Colbie nods. "Yeah. I gotta go now, I'll see you later." Then she smiles at Beca, waves and turns.

Beca mutters, "A record store. A fucking record store. This is just great. This is perfect." She starts the engine and drives away.

* * *

When she finds Imperium Store, a run down, almost decrepit little record store, she sighs. "I'm a  _fucking_  record store clerk. This could  _not_  get any worse."

When she parks, and takes a good look at the record store, she sighs even deeper. "Apparently it can."

She takes a deep breath and enters the store.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Beca stands in front of Imperium Records, unsure what to do.

 _Are record stores even a thing now?_  she wonders. With online streaming and mp3 she didn't think record stores were still surviving.

Imperium looks old, run down, exhausted, like a relic of a by-gone era. But it also seems to stand proudly resisting change surrounding it, too.

"Yeah, she's a beaut innit?" an unmistakeably Australian voice says from behind.

Beca knits her brows in disbelief and turns her head. "Fat Amy? You work here, too?" she asks.

"Mornin' to you, too, boss," Fat Amy says sleepily, handing Beca a steaming hot cup of coffee. She looks up at the building and sighs. "Yeah, boss, been working with you awhile now."

"I thought you were doing an Amy Winehouse cover band?"

Fat Amy shifts uncomfortably, smiles sheepishly. "Well, yeah, but also this. It's my day job..." She pauses and hastily adds, "Plus you're the only boss who's willing to give me days off for auditions on short notice and stuff, so..."

"Ah."

"Yep. So I guess you're stuck with me," Fat Amy says. Then she clears her throat and says in a small voice, "And also because nobody else seems to want to hire me."

Beca makes a face. "What? Why wouldn't they hire you? You're..."

"Fat..."

"I wasn't gonna say that," Beca quickly says.

"Yeah, I know, but other people think it. Fat and hot – it's a deadly combination. But it won't take long now before people start noticing my awesomeness."

Another person comes up to them and says, in a small, quiet voice, "Morning, boss."

"Morning Lilly," Beca says absent-mindedly before she does a double-take. "Lilly?"

"Yep,she works for you,too," Fat Amy says with a grin. As they watch one dorky guy come up, shivering, Fat Amy says, "Yeah that bloke works for you, too. We hired them to work two or three times a week and then they just started showing up everyday. That was two years ago. Can't fire them even if you wanted to." To Lilly and the guy she declares, "Alright. Let's get this party started! Woohoo! It's Tony Shadwell day!" She tosses the keys to Lilly and Lilly starts unlocking the door and rolls it up.

"So listen, you guys keep calling me boss...?" Beca asks Fat Amy as they all file in.

Beca watches as Lilly grabs a broom, and the guy gets a mop.

Fat Amy takes out a flash drive, looks at it and says, "Uh, yeah, you manage the place."

"So I'm a record store manager?"

Fat Amy nods, inserts the flash drive into the player, waits for it to load and says, "Yeah. More like managing a chain of stores but yeah. Comes with the perk of sleeping with the owner's daughter."

"What?"Beca asks. " I wouldn't..."

"Oh, don't worry about that. No one'd ever accuse you of sleeping your way to the top," Fat Amy says, waving the idea away with a dismissive hand as Beca blushes. "...To your face anyway." When Beca just stares at her she quickly adds, "Not like you needed to or anything."

When Beca gives her a puzzled, blank look wondering what she's talking about, Fat Amy explains, "Imperium Records is owned by Chloe's mom, Taylor Beale, formerly Taylor Van Doren, heir to the Imperium Records chain of stores. Where'd you think Chloe got her love for music? She grew up with it. Her great grandfather started it, followed by her grandfather then her mother. They've got stores all over the country. Or used to. Til online streaming and mp3 music killed the biz. They had to shut down some shops, let some people go, hanging on still. Now I guess we're down to two or three stores, I forget. They're like the little independent store that could. But don't feel so sorry for Chloe's mom, I'm sure she's got investments elsewhere."

Beca's jaw drops. "Chloe's family's rich."

Fat Amy nods, concentrating on choosing music to play. "Uh-huh. Chloe's one of those much-maligned trust fund types. Her mom almost had a fit when she found out Chloe was marrying you. You didn't even know Chloe was loaded until a few months into your marriage, when apparently Chloe's mom insisted on a pre-nup."

Fat Amy continues, "Not Kardashian or Bill Gates rich but she does okay. Rich enough to afford uni and vet school for Chloe." When Beca doesn't say anything Fat Amy says, "Evolutionary Biology, that's what Chloe majored in. Didn't have to take a student loan or anything. She could have gone on to vet school and earn a six figure income if she wanted, although her parents would have wanted her to get her MBA and take over the biz. Hell, she didn't really have to work anyway. She was set for life. But Chloe wanted to work, prove she could make it on her own plus she had Colbie so have some respect for Chloe, mate. It wasn't easy for her, you know?"

Beca is speechless.

"Don't apologize to me, though, apologize to Chloe, you owe her that at least," Fat Amy says. "I just don't like seeing you guys like that. I mean, you're still Beca and Chloe for me. Together, you'll always be Bloe. And everybody loves Bloe."

Beca makes a face. "Bloe?"

"Anyway, you get into fights over that, I think? 'Cause Chloe's go-to people when you guys are strapped for cash is her parents and apparently you have your pride or whatever."

The tinkling of the doorbell announces the arrival of the first customer and Fat Amy says, "Anyway, we get by because we're a novelty store now and we have an impressive list of vinyl records that dorky young men who can't get laid really like to collect. They like listening to music they can fall asleep unfulfilled to."

The customer tentatively approaches Fat Amy and asks, hesitant and afraid, "Do you have soul?"

Fat Amy pauses. "That depends."

The other clerk, whose name is Barry John, comes up and says, "Um, we've got them over here..."

Beca sees Lilly arranging the records and she asks, "What are you doing?"

"Arranging the records by..." Fat Amy says.."Chronological...?"

Lilly shakes her head.

"Alphabetical?"

Lilly shakes her head again.

Fat Amy comes over and looks at the records. "Lemme see...'Ace of Base', Simple Minds...', 'Pat Benatar'... Hey, organizing them by autobiographical order, awesome..."

Another customer comes in and asks, "Do you have 'I just called to say I love you'?"

Fat Amy thinks about it then says, "Yeah, no, we're not that kind of store. Maybe the mall has it..."

Beca says, "But I just saw..."

"No Beca, we didn't see anything..."

"Are we going bankrupt because you insist on  _not_  selling records?" Beca asks.

Fat Amy says, matter-of-factly, "No, we just don't sell crappy records."

When the door opens again, they all see a a tall, attractive young man in a suit, shades and well-oiled hair just looking around.

Fat Amy puts a hand up and says, "For the last time Mr. Slick, this isn't for sale. We're not selling."

The man just smiles. "Doesn't hurt to try." He looks at Beca. "Do you feel the same Ms. Mitchell?"

"Yes, she does," Fat Amy says. " The answer is still 'No'."

When the man finally leaves, Beca asks, "Who  _is_  that guy?"

"Steve Hanks from Mega Enterprises, they want to buy this place out, want to raze it to the ground and put up a mall here."

Beca nods. "Okay." She then asks," Who's Tony Shadwell?"

When she notices a growing horde of mostly middle-aged women gather by the glass doors, and Barry John goes up the door and explains something to them, Beca asks, "And who are those women reeking of unfulfilled potential and silent desperation?"

Fat Amy points to a life-sized poster of a man in a toupeé, a tight, full silver jumpsuit with ruffles. " _That's_  Tony Shadwell." Then she turns to the women outside. " _That's_  his fans."

" Who is he?" Beca asks. "He looks burnt. In fact, he looks orange."

Fat Amy says, "Believe me, I thought it was photoshopped, but that's his actual face. He's some kind of one-hit wonder from some kind of 80s New Wave band called 'Sonic Plump of Seals'. He scored a hit with a song called 'Beauty'. Here, let me play you some choice lyrics." Fat Amy stops, searches for a song, and plays it. The first strains of what sounds like a Spandau Ballet/Duran Duran reject starts playing, the lyrics of which were,  _"Moisture is the essence of wetness/ wetness is the essence of beauty..."_

Beca makes a face. "That song was a hit?"

"Yeah, people have bad taste," Fat Amy says, turning off the music. "I think Evermoist plagiarized them or something." As they watch Tony Shadwell's fans gather outside, Fat Amy says, "Let the desperate housewives come!"

Beca cringes.

A few hours later, in which they catch an underaged shoplifter, catch and throw out some couples having sex in the listening room and the toilet, prepare the store for the autograph and record signing event with said Tony Shadwell and control a long line of screaming mostly middle-aged women, Beca makes her way to the back of the store. She'd just taken the first break of the day on her chair behind the desk before Fat Amy comes in and says, "Don't forget to pick up your kids, mate."

Beca groans and drops her head on the desk. "Kill me now, please."

* * *

Colbie, Davey, and Beca stare at the food on the table.

"I don't really know how to do this," Beca says. "I mean that looks gross."

Minutes earlier Colbie had wanted baked mac and insisted she could help cook it. So she and Beca had thrown together what Beca thought would make a good baked mac - based on what she and Colbie googled. But the end results had been this: "It looks like it crawled all over the plate and  _died_ ," Colbie declares.

"Not without putting up a fight first," Beca quips.

Colbie stares at it before she says, "I  _love_  it."

"It looks like it's evolving actually," Beca observed. "Wanna give it a shot?"

Colbie nods. "Sure!"

She hands Colbie a fork, dig in and the minute they each take a bite they immediately regret it. Colbie immediately opens her mouth and spits it on the table. "Sorry...mo..." Colbie says before she stops, confused.

Beca shakes her head, grabs a kitchen towel spits hers in it and wipes what Colbie spat on the table.

"What do I call you anyway?" Colbie asks Beca.

Beca shrugs. "I dunno. Beca?"

"D'you mind me calling you that?" Colbie asks. "Also wouldn't mommy get suspicious?"

Beca stops and thinks. "You can call me mom I guess. When she's around." She cringes.

Colbie giggles."You don't like kids much, do you?"

Beca is taken aback by the question. "Um...no...?I mean, yes... I mean it depends on the kids I guess. I mean I like you." She looks at Davey. "Not sure about him. He peed on my face."

Colbie giggles. "I like you. You don't treat me like the other grown-ups do."

"How do you mean?"

"You don't call me pumpkin or cupcake or muffin or any food name..."

"Would you like me to?"

Colbie laughs."Naw. I like that you treat me like a regular person." She smiles.

"Well, thanks. I guess."

Colbie beams. "You're welcome." Colbie looks at her. "Pizza?"

"I thought you weren't allowed to eat pizza?"

Colbie grins. "Hush. Mommy doesn't need to know."

"Wow. You're saying naughty words and eating pizza. You're living dangerously!".

Colbie giggles.

After Beca has finished ordering pizza ("No onions! No tomatoes! No peppers! Only pepperoni! And ham!" Colbie shouts) in which she is preparing Davey's milk - or is attempting to, Colbie asks, "So...what did you do in your other life?"

Beca looks up from measuring the milk. "Huh? Oh, I make music."

"Music?" Colbie asks, interested. "Do you play guitar?"

"No."

"Piano?"

Beca shakes her head as she carefully pours water into the baby bottle.

"Drums?"

"Uh-uh."

"You can't play any instrument?"

Beca shakes her head.

"Not even a little bit?"

"Nope." Beca screws the cap over the bottle.

"Check if it's too hot please Davey might get upset if it's too hot."

Beca nods as she pours it on her arm.

Colbie asks, "So how do you make music if you can't play anything?"

"You know, there is this wonderful invention called the Macbook Pro that pretty much helps you make mixes and stuff."

"Mixes?"

"You take other people's music and mix them up so you can create something new."

Colbie considers this. "That doesn't sound very original. Isn't that stealing?"

" Not when they give you permission."

"But you just get stuff from other people and make music off of their music. You don't really make your own music. That's kinda boring..."

"No, it's not," Beca says sounding defensive despite herself. "C'mere let me show you."

* * *

And so for the next few minutes, Beca gives Colbie a lesson in music while she's giving her a bath in the tub with Davey Davey ignores them, just playing with his rubber ducky as Beca gently rubs soap on him.

"Okay, as a DJ your job is to get people dancing. So you can only do that if you have a good sense of rhythm, a basic knowledge of mathematics, and ninth grade biology. You want to start with beats." She wipes her hand and starts playing David Guetta on her phone." I like to start'em off at about 120 beats per minute or BPM."

"How fast is that?" Colbie asks.

Beca googles it and says, "Like when you've run really fast - like this." And she plays the audio of someone's heartbeat.

Colbie listens in awe and says, "That is  _so_  awesome."

Beca grins. "For example, reggae is slow, about 60 BPM." She plays a Bob Marley song then she continues, "Dubstep is actually 140 BPM cut to half speed. It ends up being about 70 BPM." She plays a sample dubstep piece. "Cool, huh?"

Colbie nods.

"I once attended a wedding where the bride walked down the aisle to dubstep," Beca commented.

They both stop and imagine that.

"That's musta been a weird walk down the aisle," Colbie says.

"Yeah, I think it was Craig David," Beca says.

"Did the bride lady ever make it to the altar?" Colbie asks.

Beca grins.

"Anyway, house is around 110 to 130 BPM," Beca continues. "There's a popular myth that 128 beats per minute is the rate that synergizes most with your heartbeat. That's the magic number. Once you've gotten your crowd there, you're controlling their entire circulation." Then she starts playing another song.

"That's awesome," Colbie says.

"Right?" Beca says. "So now you get it? It's cool, huh?"

Colbie looks at her and shakes her head. Beca laughs."You still can't play guitar or piano or drums."

"Okay, I'll learn to play some instrument for you," Beca says as she rubs shampoo and soap on Colbie.

"Yay!" Colbie says, clapping her hands together. She whispers,"Can you sing me a song later?So I can go to sleep? Me and my brother?"

Beca stops and looks at the wide-eyed kid looking up at her. She smiles."Sure, why not? Let me see what I have in my repertoire."

Once she's dried, powdered and dressed both kids and put them both to bed, Colbie says, " You promised to sing me a song."

"Okay. Hang on a sec." She grins and says, "I've got something for you. It's by Hall and Oates and it's called 'Everytime You Go Away,' and it goes a little something like this," then she starts to make some noises, first a guitar, then a piano, then drums. Colbie giggles and claps. Then Beca starts to sing, voice clear and melodious:

_"Babe if we can't solve any problems_

_Why do we loose so many tears_

_Whoa, so you go again_

_When the leading man appears_

_Always the same things_

_But can't you see we've got everything_

_Going on and on and on..."_

Colbie smiles, pure adoration on her face as Beca sings the chorus:

_"And every time you go away_

_You take a piece of me with you_

_And every time you go away_

_You take a piece of me with you you..."_

As she sings the next stanza, she and Colbie don't notice Chloe taking a peek by the doorway. She'd come in a little earlier, had seen them in the bath, and she hadn't wanted to disturb them. She'd gone down to clean the kitchen up and had gone back up to see that Beca's put them to bed. She watches as the two children look up at Beca, mesmerized by her voice. When Colbie asks for another song, Beca complains but starts to sing Beyonce's "Halo."

Chloe smiles, hears Beca say good night to the kids, hears Colbie say, "Good night" and is about to leave when Beca appears by the doorway.

Beca is as surprised by Chloe standing by the doorway as Chloe is of Beca's sudden appearance. For a second, neither one speaks, before Beca says, "I'm sorry for the mess we made in the kitchen. Colbie insisted on helping me and I let her because she wouldn't stop. I'm gonna clean that up. I'm sorry about the mess in the living room, too. And the bathroom. And the car. I'm cleaning those up, too. Please don't get mad like you did last time."

Chloe shakes her head, "No, no as long as you clean it up."

"And..." Beca continues, taking a deep breath, as she feels her face grow hot.

Chloe cocks her head to one side, bites her lower lip and waits for Beca to continue. Beca thinks Chloe cocking her head to the side and biting her lower lip while she stares at Beca with those pretty eyes will be the death of her.

"I'm sorry for what I said yesterday. I was an ass and a jerk and you have a right to be mad at me," Beca says in one breath. "I just... A lot of things are going on right now and..."

Chloe doesn't really let her finish as she grabs Beca by the shirt and kisses her. Beca is so taken by surprise she doesn't know what to do at first. But the kiss is over as soon as it began and Beca is left breathless and pleasantly surprised. She hadn't kissed Chloe before. Not in the other life anyway. She wonders if she's missed things back in that life, wonders what else she is missing, because her heart is beating fast, her face is red, her hands are clammy, and she realizes she's like a school girl with her first school girl crush and she hadn't felt this for anyone. Not even Jesse. How could she have gone her whole life without noticing Chloe and the possibilities life with her offered?

Chloe looks at her, uncertain and hopeful. "The kids are asleep," Chloe whispers.

Beca nods. "Yeah, I put them to bed. I thought it was gonna be hard but the singing really put them to sleep. Not that I have a boring voice or anything..."

When she sees Chloe cross her arms in front of her, purse her lips and look at her impatiently, she suddenly understands what Chloe is saying. "Oh.  _Oh_.Oooohhh."

Chloe rolls her eyes, grabs her hand and pulls her towards their bedroom. "C'mon, we've only got a few minutes before either one wakes up..."

When they get to the bedroom, the bedroom door has been locked, music is playing, and Chloe is already on top of her and kissing her, fumbling with Beca's shirt, belt and jeans.

Beca's never kissed Chloe before, not in her other life anyway, and she hadn't realized how soft her lips were, how good she tasted, how good she smelled, how soft she was, moving gently against Beca. Beca finds her hand snaking underneath Chloe's shirt, finds the smooth skin within, her other hand finding Chloe's thigh and stroking it gently. Chloe moans softly as she stops and takes her top off, impatiently takes Beca's shirt off, and pulls Beca's jeans off before resuming kissing Beca. Beca runs her hands on Chloe's body, then she stops, pulls away and looks at Chloe.

"What?" Chloe asks. "You're staring. Something wrong?"

"No,no," Beca quickly answers. "It's just...you're so beautiful...just so fucking beautiful," she whispers, putting a hand on Chloe's cheek. "How could I have missed this?"

Chloe chuckles. "Yeah a lot of people tend to miss all of this," she gestures to herself, "Until they're actually with me." She smiles, leans over and kisses Beca some more. Beca feels like it's going too fast considering she technically hasn't slept with Chloe yet. Chloe seems to notice her hesitation because she stops. "Are you okay? Is this okay?"

Beca nods, not knowing what else to say.

Chloe traces a finger on Beca's face. "I can't believe it took you forever to realize I was into you," she whispers.

"What do you mean?"

"C'mon, first time I saw you freshman week, that time at the shower, that party where I told you I was glad we met, that time at camp I told you I wish I'd experimented more, that time during the USO concert..." She looks at Beca.

Beca just looks at her blankly.

"What about the USO concert?"Beca asks. But then she shakes her head and says, "You know what? Never mind," as she kisses Chloe.

Chloe smiles and kisses her back.

Later, lying naked and facing each other, Chloe says, "After the USO concert, when I found out I was pregnant with Colbie...I thought my life was over...I was in vet school...I was confused and didn't know what to do...you offered to help and we went from there..."

"So it wasn't like...? I don't know..." Beca asks, her voice trails off.

Chloe smiles. "We were friends for a long time, then besties and roommates just raising a child together, and now we're here..."

Beca smiles. She leans over and kisses Chloe.

The baby starts to scream from the baby monitor. Beca groans. Chloe reluctantly pulls away, gets up, grabs a robe and puts it on. She grins at Beca.

"Be right back."

Beca smiles back.

When Chloe shuts the door quietly behind her, Beca lies back down and stares at the ceiling. She doesn't quite know what to feel. But she thinks she's beginning to like this life.


	5. 5

Chapter 5

An alarm is ringing in the distance. Beca doesn't want to wake up yet. She's having a great dream about having Chloe as her wife, having two kids in the suburbs of New Jersey and a job in a record store. It is a wonderful dream. A wonderful dream that included having spent the whole night with Chloe holding her close, whispering and giggling with each other. Chloe. The thought of Chloe brings a smile to her face. Chloe. Chloe. Chloe. She could spend her whole life with Chloe and it would be okay.

In a few seconds she achieves consciousness and realizes something: She's never really fallen in love with anyone. Not Jesse, not any of the people she dated before him or after. But Chloe - she thinks she could fall in love with Chloe. Why hadn't she kept in touch with Chloe? What had happened? What made her drop out of college anyway? It seemed so long ago she doesn't exactly remember what triggered it.

Before she could process this even further somebody bounds on the bed, she opens her eyes and it is Colbie, grinning up at her and saying, "Morning Beca! Breakfast?"

Oh god, still in the fucking dream, she thinks.

She groans, "Colbie, it's too early for breakfast."

"C'mon. Mommy doesn't want to make pancakes but she says if I can make you get up and make you make me pancakes then I can eat pancakes."

"Ugh, I hate you Chloe," she mumbles as she gets up, carries Colbie and stumbles down the stairs.

"You guys hate each other, huh?" Colbie asks.

"What?" Beca asks her.

"Last night I heard mommy say I hate you to you too, and then she kinda punches the wall over and over..."

Beca flushes. "Er... No I don't hate mommy. It's just a little game that grown ups do all the time."

Colbie nods. "Okay. You like playing games with mommy?"

Beca flushes even more.

"Why are you so red, Beca? Is something wrong?"Colbie asks. " Mommy thinks sometimes I have no filter."

Beca grins. "Really? You have no filter? I hadn't noticed."

When they get to the kitchen, Chloe is already feeding Davey. When Chloe sees Beca, her whole face lights up and she smiles at Beca.

"Hey, sleepyhead,"Chloe said. She offers her a cup. "Made you some coffee."

Beca smiles. "Thanks."

Chloe smiles back. "Sure. Now go make your daughter some funny looking pancakes - she only eats the pancakes you make."She shoves a box of pancake mix towards Beca.

"Okay." Beca sets Colbie down on the floor. Beca instinctively takes out her iPhone to google "How to make pancakes."

Chloe leans over, shoulder touching with Beca's, a hand on Beca's waist as she looks at what Beca is doing. When she sees a pancake recipe come up, Chloe looks at Beca and grins. "A recipe. Of course. I don't do recipes. I cook by instinct. I just throw everything in and hope for the best."

Beca looks at her. "Of course, you do."

Chloe grins at her.

"...and then, after, can we watch 'Sing'?" Colbie interrupts them.

"Uh..."Beca looks at Chloe for confirmation as she takes a sip of coffee.

Chloe smiles and nods.

"Sure."

"...And 'Moana'...? And 'Zootopia'?..."

Beca raises her eyebrows at Chloe.

Chloe opens one of the cupboards, brings out mixing bowl, spatula, fork, eggs and butter and hands them to Beca. To Colbie she says, " Honey, you watched those like, a gazillion times...don't you want to watch anything else?"

Colbie looks at Chloe and scrunches up her nose. "No." Then she scrambles up her chair. "And then maybe after we can make snow angels."

Chloe grins at leans over and kisses Beca on the lips. She whispers, "You spoil her rotten, you know. You only have yourself to blame."

She kisses Beca again and Colbie speaks up, exasperated. "Stop with the kissing already...I'm a child, for god's sake."

Beca's jaw drops, surprised at the child. The child grins at her.

"Where does she get all that?" Beca asks Chloe.

Chloe quirks an eyebrow. "You practically raised her and you wonder where she gets it from? She may look like me but she's like Beca two point oh."

Beca rolls her eyes.

Chloe pats Beca's ass and says, "Pancakes, go. They're not going to make themselves. We're going out later."

"I thought I had work?"

"It's Sunday, silly. It's family day," Chloe says. "And as the future heir of a dying business I think you can take some time off. Fat Amy's got you covered."

* * *

Beca realizes she likes this life. As she makes inedible pancakes, laughs and jokes around with Chloe and Colbie, she realizes she likes being married to Chloe, Colbie and Davey as her family. She even likes that she has in-laws and a house and a car that looks like a hearse.

She finds she likes other mundane, domestic things, too: shopping with Chloe and the kids, sundae and French fries after, with Beca dodging the fries Davey is throwing at her, Colbie giggling at them, driving around in the car, car stereo playing Jessie J's "Price Tag" and Chloe, Colbie singing along the lyrics as Beca rolls her eyes.

And Chloe, Chloe just looking at Beca, smiling at her, like there's no where else she'd rather be, no one else she'd rather be with, than Beca.

Beca starts to think maybe Chloe is the only one she wants to be with, too. And this is the only place where she wants to be: With Chloe, and Colbie and Davey and this life.

So it is a shock for her when she comes home, checks the mail and sees an envelope. When she opens it, she realizes it is hers and Chloe's divorce papers.


	6. 6

Chapter 6

Beca stares at the divorce papers, not knowing what to do with it. But there's a dinner to make, kids to feed and give a bath to, a movie marathon to finish and kids to put to sleep.

She looks at Chloe, tries to look for signs of dissatisfaction, unhappiness, depression. Was this a failed marriage? Who failed? Did she not care enough? Not love enough? Did she fail Chloe as a partner? Was she a bad mother? Did she not get along with the in-laws? Did she have some kind of drinking or drug or gambling problem that she didn't know about? She'd given her father so much shit for his own failed marriage, for his own shortcomings, that she hadn't realized that maybe she is her father's daughter after all: a complete and total failure at intimate relationships.

* * *

She wonders about this for a few days. She wants to confront Chloe but she can't seem to find it in her heart to do so.

It feels like she's plunged into a dark abyss from which she cannot emerge from.

She feels disoriented, uncertain, unstable - like she's free falling into nothingness.

She tries to think back, in her other life, for any signs that indicated this would happen - but thinking back is like going through a long dark tunnel - revisiting a past she's tried to forget.

In her other life, she'd left Barden freshman year, after they won Nationals. Was it Jesse? Jesse wanted to take their relationship to the next level. She didn't think she was ready for that.

She'd gone to Chloe and they'd discussed it over drinks. They'd gotten drunk that night. Something happened she remembers. They'd had some discussion that led to them not talking for years and years.

* * *

When she finally finds the courage to bring it up to Chloe, late at night, when the kids are already asleep and it feels like everyone and everything is asleep and it's just the two of them - showing her the envelope and divorce papers wordlessly, Chloe had looked so torn, so heartbroken that for a few minutes Chloe doesn't know what to say.

"What's this all about?"

"I meant to tell you but..."

"You forgot?" Beca asks. "You forgot to mention we were  _divorcing_?"

Chloe shifts uncomfortably. She clears her throat and hesitates, "We were…on a break…"

"A break," Beca repeats, disbelieving. "I don't understand. I thought everything was fine."

"I wanted to believe that we were,"Chloe says softly. "But we both know it's not. It hasn't been fine for a long time. No matter how many times we keep telling ourselves it is."

When she sees that Beca is visibly upset, Chloe adds, "I don't get why you're so upset, you asked for a break."

Beca is surprised. "Yes, but, I didn't ask for a  _break-up_."

Chloe is silent for what seems like forever. She holds Beca's gaze for a long time, before she lets out a deep sigh.

"Beca, I'm sorry," Chloe now begins. "I took advantage of you and worst of all, I did this with a kid. I thought in time we could get to a place where everything is fine - but what we are in now - it's not enough for both of us. I did this. And at least I can do something about it now."

"Chloe, I'm not just some random guy you can hook up with and ditch. I can stick around. I can be that person who can be with you…"

"I don't need you to stick around…"

"What do you want from me?"

Chloe shrugs and shakes her head. "I don't know. But I know it's not this. I just want... _more_ …" When Beca doesn't say anything, Chloe says, "I know I deserve better. And I know  _you_  deserve better, too." Chloe leans over and touches Beca's hand delicately. "I think we've made a mistake."

Beca looks up, eyes filled with tears. "No, we're  _not_  a mistake. I don't like giving up."

Chloe gives her a sad smile. "I'm sure you don't, but…" before Beca could interrupt, Chloe takes a deep breath. "I'm holding you back, Beca," Chloe blurts out now."You don't say it...but I feel like this domestic suburban life we have - it's holding you back. I feel like I've hijacked you from your destiny or from a better future. I don't think this is meant for you. I see it every time you drag yourself to work... I see it every time you look at something you want to buy but realize you can't because we're always on a budget and…"

"Chloe, no…" Beca says, feeling weak, feeling like she is drowning.

"Beca...remember that time we had that huge fight at the mall - right before Christmas. I blame the exhaustion and stress - you've never liked Christmas anyway, and the shopping and the wrapping of presents and the going to parties and awkward family dinners and you wanted to blow $3,000 on the new iMac Pro laptop and another $1,500 on a new iPhone. You got so mad, you threw a fit at the store, you told me you at least deserved it, you told me dropped off the kids, you picked them up at the end of the day, you made dinners, cleared the dishes, paid the bills, went to work every day, day in, day out without any complaints and the least you could have is a new iMac and iPhone. You walked out after. And I stood there as you walked out and I had to close my eyes and count to ten because I know if I didn't I'd completely have a nervous breakdown."

Beca doesn't remember this of course because it happened before Christmas. She doesn't know how to respond.

She isn't entirely surprised this would be the reaction of Other Beca, her old self would have done the same, but she knows exactly what getting a $3,000 iMac and a $2,000 iPhone feels like: Nothing. Like she's gotten what she's asked for and it feels like nothing. Empty. Worthless. She knows now she could get everything she wants and still feel empty and unhappy. She wants to meet Other Beca now and tell her it's not all it's cracked up to be, that life isn't entirely just about the money and get everything you want. This life Other Beca has made with Chloe, she envies it. Wishes she had it. Makes her realize there really is more to life than the relentless pursuit of money and success. That there's also family and love. And mostly love.

She wants to tell Other Beca she's wrong. If she could go back in time and talk to young Beca she would have wanted to tell her to stop being a dick and a dork and live. Just  _live_.

What she does though is tell Chloe, "I was wrong, okay? I was maybe having a bad day and I took it out on you...I didn't mean to..."

Chloe stares at her as if she doesn't know her, eyes glistening from unshed tears. "Who  _are_  you right now? 'Cause I don't get this passive aggressive bipolar schizoid amnesiac deal you've got going. One minute you're mad and you hate this life. Next minute you're all I'm loving everything about this life..."

"I..." Beca starts to answer but she could not.

"We gave it a shot, Beca for five years. I can't anymore. I just can't. I've been giving this, us, a chance for the last five years but I can't anymore," Chloe says, close to tears and choking. "We're best friends, Beca. We're roommates, we're not…" Chloe's voice breaks. "I can't live another day like this. This is for the best…"

"You can't just decide what's best for both of us, don't I get to have a say, too?" Beca asks. When Chloe doesn't answer, she asks, "What about Colbie? What about Davey?"

"You can still see them… god knows they both adore you. You'll always be a part of their lives. If you want to. You know that."

When Beca feels the drops fall, she realizes she is crying. "Chloe…"

"Beca, you know this isn't easy for me. I mean, on the surface, you'd almost think everything was fine. See, I've got this great person who loves my kids - and she sure does like me a lot. And I can't live that way. It's not how I am. I've wanted,  _needed,_  to just make the best of things, and you've needed to be 'responsible'... if one of us doesn't say something now we might lose ten years just...trying to be polite about it."

Beca doesn't let her finish. She walks out of their bedroom, out of their house, into their car and drives away.

* * *

"You shouldn't blame yourself," Fat Amy says when she mentions it to her. She'd spent the whole night at the record store, cold and shivering at the back office. It's where Fat Amy finds her the next day, having a cup of bad coffee, eyes blood shot, tired and sleepy. "I didn't know you guys were getting divorced. I knew you had some marital problems but I don't know...we didn't really talk about that. Because boundaries, like you mentioned. And aca-awkward. Maybe you're great at friendship and really bad at intimacy. Although if we're being honest Beca..."

Beca asks, " What?"

"You aren't exactly the easiest person to be with."

"What? So you assume it's my fault?"

Fat Amy shrugs. "Why would Chloe be the problem though?"

* * *

In an instant Beca remembers the argument she had with Chloe all those years ago, when she dropped out of college.

Chloe had blurted out something. Beca had told her she was thinking of dropping out, Chloe had tried to convince her to stay, told her she couldn't just leave.

"Why?" Beca had asked.

"There are so many reasons to stay..."

"Name one..."

"The Bellas...Nationals..."

Beca snorts. "I'm not indispensable...Cynthia Rose has a good voice, too and she's a stronger singer..."

"You  _are_  indispensable,"Chloe insists. "You've turned it all around for the Bellas."

Beca shakes her head, unconvinced. "Not everything is about just winning some dumb Nationals, Chlo."

Chloe looks at her like she's stabbed her in the heart. "What about your friends?"

"It's college, Chloe, I doubt we'll stay in touch for the rest of our lives...it's just college."

Chloe looks at her, saddened and a little hurt.

"Anyway, I think the Bellas can easily find someone to replace me..."

"But you're not irreplaceable."

"Yes I am. We all are," Beca says.

"So you're just going to leave, just like that?"

"Everyone has to leave sometime, it might as well be now," Beca says.

"Don't go," Chloe says. "I have this strange feeling if you drop out and go, I'll never see you again. Ever. Stay. Please. We need you.  _I_  need you."

Beca rolls her eyes. "God, Chloe, why are you so  _needy_?"

That set it off, Beca now remembers. A huge argument ensued after - the content of which she can no longer remember, but it ended with Chloe telling her, "You know what? You're an obnoxious, selfish, self-absorbed, terrible person who's so caught up in her own little world she can't even see past herself and see the people who love her."

Beca had rolled her eyes at her then. "What're you talking about? Jesse? It's college, he's a guy, he'll pretty much find somebody else in a heartbeat..."

"I'm not talking about Jesse..."

It was the way that Chloe had said it then that made Beca stop, think and realize something at that moment.

And as she looks at Chloe then, a lot of things suddenly come together.

Beca doesn't know what to say then. She didn't really know how to respond to that.

When Beca doesn't say anything, Chloe says, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have..."

"I can't deal with this right now..."

She turns to walk away and Chloe says,"Sure, walk away. 'Cause that's your answer for everything, isn't it?"

Beca stops, considers turning around and responding, but instead walks off. She drops out of college, books a ticket to L.A. And hadn't looked back since.

One thing she hadn't realized until now. Chloe wasn't exactly being needy. Chloe was trying to tell her she cared for her. And Beca had just rejected her.

* * *

So she's a jerk in any alternate universe. She feels immediately guilty for realizing this.

How had she grown into this person that she herself despises?

Her life is so unlike the life she imagined it to be when she was younger. But does anyone actually think the future life they imagined when they were younger was exactly what they got? Do we really got all that we wish for and are happy for it? She remembers wanting to be like her father, all grown-up and mature, despite his failed marriage and utter inability to relate to her, in his tweed jacket and grown up suits and briefcase and books and car and house. She remembers wanting to, but failing at it, and failing it in a huge way. 

She remembers that part of the reason she left Barden was the realization that college wasn't it was all cracked up to be. She hadn't actually enjoyed all the campus events and clubs and all that school spirit.

She'd given joining Bellas a chance because her father asked her, too, had given her friendship with the Bellas, her father,  _Jesse_  a chance - but they'd won Nationals and then there was this creeping realization of what her life could be from then on: Perfect. Unbelievably, unbearably so.

She doesn't really know what compelled her to leave then but maybe it's everything and nothing all at the same time, maybe it's really just who she is: The second she put her life together she has to find a way to ruin it. It's in her nature.

That's what she did, that's what she does, isn't it? She walks away. She quits when the going gets tough.

Maybe it was for the best that she dropped out of college.

Maybe it is for the best that they are divorcing.

* * *

She is thinking about all of this when Chloe suddenly calls her. Chloe's mother has been rushed to the hospital.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Nope, not a re-post. But yes, inspired by Family Man, and a lot of other movies and TV shows and books. Points for you if you recognize them. Thanks for the reviews. Comments always welcome.


	7. 7

Chapter 7

Taylor Beale, Beca's mother-in-law and Chloe's mom, has been rushed to the hospital. She had had an attack. Her blood pressure had shot up and it wouldn't go down so they had to rush her to the hospital.

Beca finds out when she gets to the hospital, finding Chloe pacing back and forth in the waiting room, Davey asleep on one of the chairs, Colbie sitting and fidgeting, watching Chloe with her eyes. Chloe's father is inside the room with his wife. It took them forever to get a room. Chloe's mother had to stay out by the hallway waiting for an available room all night before they could wheel her into one.

It is Colbie who first sees Beca, Colbie whose eyes light up, and she scrambles down on the chair and rushes towards Beca, giving her a hug. Beca scoops her up and holds her tight, like she's afraid if she lets her go she will disappear into thin air.

"Where were you?" Colbie asks, voice muffled from where she's buried her face in Beca's neck.

Beca feels guilty, doesn't know what to say. "I had to...work overtime..."

Colbie hugs her tighter, pudgy little arms tight on her neck. "I missed you. I thought you left. I had a bad dream that you were gone and you didn't even say goodbye."

Beca tries to comfort her, rubs her back, it seems to calm her down. She looks up and Chloe is infront of her.

"I'm sorry I called," Chloe says now, wringing her hands together. "I didn't know who else to call."

Beca nods. "It's ok. What happened?"

Chloe absently closes her fist and Beca notices she has a wad of tissue clenched in one fist. She looks at Chloe and notices the dark circles under her eyes, the red-rimmed eyes, the exhaustion, the despair. Beca just wants to scoop her up and hold her. She reaches up, puts a hand on Chloe's arm.

In a rush Chloe tells her that her mother had been keeping a lot more than she let on. That their record stores were in bigger trouble than they all thought.

"The stores are going bankrupt," Chloe says. "Mom kept it from me. She was trying to find a way to save it. This was my family's legacy. My great grandpa's and my grandpa's and my dad's...the one where you're working - that was our first ever shop... And that guy, Steve whatsisname wouldn't stop bothering her about selling...and that's when mom had the attack..." Her voice chokes. Beca's heart breaks. She can't really bear to see Chloe like this. So in the middle of Chloe's tearful account of her mom's attack, Beca finds herself reaching out and hugging Chloe, scent of lavender in her nose and whispering, "It's gonna be okay, okay? It's gonna be okay."

Through the tearful, muffled sobs, Chloe nods and holds Beca even tighter.

When the doctor comes with Daniel, Chloe's father, Beca reluctantly releases Chloe, Chloe sniffles and follows the doctor as they huddle and have a whispered conversation about Mrs. Beale.

Beca makes her way to one of the chairs, the one nearest to Davey. Colbie comes and instinctively crawls up Beca's lap. Beca holds her and Colbie's small hands clutch at Beca's arms.

Colbie looks up at Beca and asks, "Beca, is grandma going to be okay?"

Beca tries to make out what the doctor, Chloe and Daniel are talking about but she cannot. But judging from how Chloe seems to be calming down she thinks maybe it's going to be okay.

"I think so," Beca answers.

Colbie is silent for awhile before she speaks up again. "You had a fight."

Beca looks at her. "With whom?"

"You and mommy. About work," Colbie elaborates.

Beca waits for Colbie to continue but when she doesn't, she asks, "What were we fighting about?"

Colbie shrugs. "About money, I guess." They are silent for awhile then Colbie says, "It was around Thanksgiving I think. You had a big argument with mommy. Mommy was looking for some money? Some missing money..."

Beca raises her eyebrows as if to prompt Colbie. When Colbie doesn't say anything, Beca asks, exasperated, "What missing money?"

Colbie throws up her hands. " I don't know Beca, I just overheard you guys fighting. Maybe from the record store? Mommy says it's not good to listen to stuff you're not supposed to. But mommy was really upset about it."

Beca nods, puzzled.

She looks up and sees that Chloe, her father and the doctor have disappeared. She guesses they've gone to look in on the patient. She hopes they could at least get to see her mother-in-law and that visiting hours are not yet over.

In a few seconds, Fat Amy calls and asks how Mrs. Beale is.

"I'm not sure but I think she's gonna be fine."

Fat Amy breathes a sigh of relief. "Oh, that's good. For a minute there you had me worried about Mrs. B. Anyway, shop's okay, everything's taken care of. Take your time..."

"Yeah, alright," Beca says, distracted. "Hey, Amy, Colbie mentioned me and Chloe fighting about some missing money? From the record store?Do you know anything about that?"

There's a long silence on the other end of the line that makes Beca thi k the line's gone dead, so Beca says, "Amy? Amy? You there?"

There's a prolonged silence before she hears a deep sigh and Fat Amy sheepishly and cautiously saying, "Yeah...about that..."

* * *

"You  _what_?!" Beca asks.

"Okay, okay, you're doing that scary, creepy Nicolas Cage thing again," Fat Amy says over the line. "Calm down, Beca."

Beca takes a deep breath. She'd already thrown a fit about how Fat Amy answers the phone (" Hello, Imperium Records, Fat Amy speaking. At the beep, please leave your name, your number, your relationship status, your measurements, your order and a brief justification for the ontological necessity of music and we'll get back to you...")and knowing that there's a possibility that Fat Amy may have lost some money not only upsets Beca but is agitating her as well.

"Where is the money now Amy?" Beca asks slowly, carefully, between gritted teeth.

"Ehmm...Atlantic City...?"

"What's it doing in Atlantic City, Amy?"

There is a silence on the other end of the line before Fat Amy says, "Ehmm, I already told you this before... re-circulating...?"

"You mean to tell me you lost $ 10,000 in Atlantic City? The $10,000 from the record stores?"

"Ehmmm..."

"What...? How...? I can't even..."

"Look. You shouldn't have asked me to handle the money. You already said I was very unreliable..."

Beca makes an irritated "ugh" punches the end call button and starts to pace up and down.

She is going to kill Fat Amy.

* * *

As she contemplates what she will do with Fat Amy, Chloe comes and says, "Hey..."

"Hey," Beca says softly. "How's your mom?"

Chloe says, "She's okay. Well, as okay as she could ever be under the circumstances... She still has to go through some more lab tests, just standard procedure stuff, to rule out some other stuff, but if and when all goes well, she'll be out in a couple of days or so."

Beca nods. "That's good."

Chloe nods. "Yeah. So hey, mom wants to see you guys. It's past visiting hours, but we asked the guard to just have you, Colbie and Davey see mom. That okay?"

Beca nods as she picks the sleeping Davey up and Colbie holds out her hand for her. Beca holds Colbie's hand while Chloe's hand.

* * *

When they enter the room, Colbie lets go of their hands and rushes towards her grandmother with a delighted, "Grandma...!"Beca and Chloe unconsciously smile at the child as Chloe gets Davey from Beca and approaches her mother. They start chatting and joking and whispering and giggling.

Taylor Beale is nothing but a headstrong, tough woman and right as they enter Beca hears her giving instructions to her husband, about the house, the dog, meetings, country club, dinners and parties and business. She looks tired, tireder than anyone Beca's ever seen, but she also looks stunning. Beca thinks maybe she's put some make up on and she's laughing and talking to her daughter and grandchildren, telling them she's going to be fine. Beca suddenly just wants to magically make all the pain go away.

Beca hangs back, afraid of ruining this moment.

But then suddenly, the kids and Chloe and Chloe's mom seem to be finished and everyone but Chloe files out of the room quietly, waving their goodbyes to Taylor Beale and saying their "I love you's" and "Get-well soon's" and promising to come visit. Before Chloe leaves, she leans over to Beca and says, "She wants to talk to you."

Beca isn't sure what kind of relationship Other Beca has with her mother-in-law, she thinks it's an instinctive fear of in-laws in general but when Taylor Beale looks at her with her steely blue eyes, Beca's hands start getting clammy, her throat starts to dry and she has to swallow down the fear and her heart starts to beat faster. So she has to take a deep breath and approaches her mother-in-law cautiously, as one would approach a cobra or a lion. She sits beside her and Taylor Beale regards her silently for so long that Beca squirms, is ready to confess crimes - real and imagined, wanting to be absolved right away. She doesn't know why but she has this urge to be liked by this old lady.

"Beca..." Taylor Beale says by way of greeting.

"Mrs. Beale..." Beca replies.

Taylor Beale scoffs at Beca's response it almost makes Beca jump up out of her chair.

"We've known each other long enough to be on a first name basis, Beca,"Taylor Beale says. "I mean, for pete's sake, you've been with my daughter five years... You raise children together." She must see Beca's confusion because she says, "How many times do I have to tell you? Call me Taylor. Or mom. Whichever makes you less uncomfortable."

Beca shifts in her seat. "Ehm...neither actually. I'm just trying to make sure you don't kill me..."

Taylor Beale laughs. "Why would I do that? Because of that $10,000 your friend gambled away and lost in Atlantic City?"

So that's where the money went, Beca thinks. "How...?"

"I admire your loyalty to your friend, Beca, but Fat Amy - really who insists on naming themselves Fat Amy? Lovely girl - anyway Fat Amy came clean and told me what happened..."

Beca lets this sink in before she says, "So, does that mean we're both off the hook?"

Taylor raises one elegant, slim eyebrow. "Are you fucking kidding me?"

The profanity coming from someone over sixty takes Beca aback.

Taylor smirks. "Of course not. You are most certainly not. You should've known better and I could, if I wanted to, probably throw Fat Amy in jail. But she told me why she did it, and she's paid half of it already and promises to pay the other half back so..."

"I didn't even know she had that kind of money..."

"Well, apparently she does..."

They fall silent again before Beca blurts out, worried and guilty, "Is the record store really screwed?"

Taylor Beale just looks at heart, suddenly old abd weary and she sighs, "It's been a long time coming anyway, Beca...the stores have been through a lot - riots and fires and things like that..."

"Are we closing down?"

Taylor takes a deep breath, "We'll have to close the other stores for now, yes."

Beca's face falls so Taylor quickly adds, "We're keeping the main branch. The one you manage. So don't worry about that. That's our first store so I don't think we can close that down. What with rising operating costs, competition, plumetting sales, we hardly even break even..."

Beca nods, trying to absorb this.

"I should have listened to you Beca...you wanted to innovate, to specialize, to go online, focus more on vinyl records, get more popular acts to perform, sponsor events, even launch an indie label for up-and-coming artists..."

Beca looks up, surprised.

"I wasn't a big fan of Shadwell and he wouldn't have been my first choice but I guess it's a start," Taylor says. "I gave you a hard time, I know and I'm sure it put a strain on your relationship with Chloe. She supported you and your ideas but I was the one who was adamant that we stick to what we know. I think she's always supported you, no?" When Beca gives her a smile, Taylor smiles back and says, "I knew there was a reason she failed Russian Litt three times. I thought it was because she was bad at Russian or something but when I found out it was on purpose I was not very happy about it. She told me she wanted to stay in the Bellas but I didn't believe her. And then when I met you I realized she was failing Russian Litt on purpose..."

Beca blushed.

"Oh, don't be embarassed,"Taylor says, waving a dismissive hand away. "I'd be annoyed if she failed for a guy because no guy is ever that worth it but..."

Beca's face is burning but she manages to smile.

"You seem to be, so I guess that's ok," Taylor finishes.

They fall into silence. Beca doesn't know what to say. Taylor studies her, blue eyes seeming to pierce her soul. Beca wants to avert her gaze but she cannot.

Taylor Beale seems to be debating with herself what to say next before she speaks up again. "Listen, relationships are a lot of work."

Beca listens.

"I want to tell you something Chloe's father and I - we've had our problems, too..."

"Oh, I don't think I want to hear this..."

"When we were younger and more foolish than now...something happened," Taylor continues, ignoring Beca's protests.

"When I was in Switzerland on a business conference...something happened...I met someone..."

"I definitely don't want to hear this..."

"We were going through a rough patch, Daniel and I...and there was this man...Swiss-French, he was tall and handsome and he has the most soulful eyes I'd ever seen and when he moved..." Taylor smiles with a glint in her eye.

"Oh god, please don't go into the details..." Beca says, grimacing.

"We had an affair," Taylor says. "He was an amazing lover..."

"Taylor, please be as vague as possible..."

Taylor smiles. "It was a very dark period in our lives...it consisted of a lot of talking and therapy and a willingness to work things out..."

"Taylor, I wouldn't cheat on Chloe..."

"I'm sure you wouldn't, that's not what I'm saying," Taylor says with a smile. "I'm just saying... You don't just give up without a fight. You fight for what you believe in, fight for what you love... If there's anything that I hope you would take away from this conversation, I hope it's that..."

"But Chloe seems to have already made up her mind..."

Taylor rolls her eyes. "This is the same girl who also failed Russian Litt three times for you."

"What do I do?"

Taylor grins. "I don't know. But I know you shouldn't go down without a fight. You only live once anyway. Go big. Go public. Sometimes some people just want that..."

Beca nods, letting that sink in.

"You know she's worth all that at least," Taylor ends.

Beca thinks about it for a time before she slowly nods, a plan forming in her mind.

Taylor smiles at her. "So, what's the plan?"

Beca thinks about it at first and then leans over and says, "So, here's the plan..."

When Beca is done outlining her plan, Taylor smiles and nods her approval and says, "Not bad. I say go for it."

* * *

When Chloe comes in and says, "Hey, hate to interrupt this bonding time between my two favorite girls but apparently visiting hours are over? And you guys have got to go. I have to stay and look after mom...Beca could you watch over the kids?"

Beca is already nodding before Chloe can even finish the question. But Taylor is already shaking her head and saying, "No, no, I'm gonna be fine...you both stay with the kids..."

Chlow shakes her head in turn. "Nope, sorry, can't leave you alone like this..."

As mother and daughter continue to argue, Beca slips out and gathers the kids, Davey still sleeping soundly in her arms, Colbie sleeping in her grandfather's arms. Before they leave, Chloe comes out and says, "Hey, will you be okay?"

"Yeah. It's fine. You don't have to ask that," Beca says.

Chloe nods, thankful. "Okay. I'll see you later?"

"Sure..."

Beca goes home with their kids, her mind wheering with plans.

She just hopes she could pull it off.


	8. 8

Chapter 8

It takes Beca a few days, a lot of phonecalls, much cajoling and begging and strings pulled before she gets to the point where it all finally comes together and she thinks she could legitimately pull it off.

Aside from a few hesitant replies, some who never replied and a couple who outright rejected her proposal, she is able to put together what could reasonably be called her "Last Chance with Chloe" project. She spends her days at the record store, contacting people, running the store, looking after the kids, as Chloe looks after her mother, making sure she's okay.

* * *

The day of the event, Beca arrives at the Imperium, children in tow and sees an excited Fat Amy already hard at work, clipboard in hand barking orders. A sound system is being hoisted up on a make-shift stage hastily constructed inside the shop. The aisles of records have been cleared and stored in back, tables and chairs set up, a make-shift bar on the side set up. A band is busily setting up sound equipment, drums, bass guitar, lead guitar, keyboards - making soundchecks. Beca is surprised at how massive the record store is when it is cleared of the racks of records and other accouterments of a shop.

Beca spots the lead singer, Calamity, a tall, scrawny, tattooed woman from afar and she waves. The lead singer waves back.

"Evermoist," Fat Amy says from behind. "Can't believe you got them to come."

Beca shrugs, looking smug. "It's for a good cause. Plus I promised you wouldn't challenge them to another riff-off."

"We keep losing those anyway. I don't know why we keep challenging people to those,"Fat Amy comments.

Beca smirks.

"No time for practice anyway, so it's gonna be a lot of improv, people can do acapella or have a band back them up," Fat Amy says.

"That's fine," Beca says, spotting someone in the crowd: Jesse, accompanied by Aubrey. "Hey. Can't believe he actually came."

"Who?" Fat Amy asks, looking at where Beca is looking at. "Well, can you blame him? Not after how it all went down with you guys..."

"Remind me again why we're not talking?"

"Jesse is with Aubrey."

"Like with  _with_?"

"Yep, like with  _with_  Aubrey?"

"While we were together?"

"No, Aubrey would die. Right after. But it seemed like a big deal at the time because, I don't know, reasons."

"Are we on speaking terms now?"

"If you want to be,"Fat Amy replies. "Aubrey was very good about it. Waited forever before she could go out with Jesse. She was always thinking of you. And how you might get all weird about it."

"And did I?"

"Yeah. You were upset. You were talking about being sisters and girl power and so on," Fat Amy says. "Which I didn't get at the time...you weren't really even into Jesse anyway..."

"Hey, I was, too..."

Fat Amy looks at her, one eyebrow raised.

"Okay, I admit he's a bit blah and boring and very goody two shoes but, he's a good guy and I cared for him in my own way..."

Fat Amy cocks her head to the side and scoffs. "And what way is that? I thought there was only one way to love a person. Once you start saying you loved someone in your own way, don't think you loved them in the first place." She starts to think about it some more and adds, "In fact, I've always wondered about you two. You seemed more like best friends to me actually. You seemed to have more spark with Chloe."

Beca smiles at her, trying not to blush.

Jesse and Aubrey, spot her then, and Jesse waves, hesitant at first,but Beca waves at them and it gives Jesse the encouragement to come over.

"Hey, thanks for inviting me, us,"Jesse says, smile uncertain, expression cautious.

Aubrey, standing behind Jesse like he's her human shield, hand clutching Jesse's tightly, nods in agreement.

But Beca just smiles expansively and says, "Thanks for coming. I,  _we_ , really appreciate it."

Jesse nods as Aubrey spots the other Bellas and moves to greet them, relieved there are other familiar faces. "Don't mention it," he says with a shrug. He looks at Beca then, "Anything for an old friend. We gotta stick together and save the music right?"

Beca nods in agreement. "Yeah. Thanks, really."

"So we're cool, right?" Jesse asks. "Things aren't gonna get weird between us or anything?"

"It will only get weird if you let it," Beca replies with a grin.

"Okay," Jesse says.

"Besides, I got the girl...Sort of."

Fat Amy comes over again to report that Das Sound Machine has arrived, as have 'The Green Bay Packers' and various 'Trebles' alumna. With her is a wide-eyed Colbie watching everything with wonder and fascination. As Imperium starts to fill up with musicians and some early onlookers waiting for the show to begin, the shop starts becoming a flurry of activity, an energy, a buzz, an excitement is rolling throughout the crowd, buoyed by the anticipation of expectation, of having a chance to see people coming together.

Jesse sees Colbie, squats and smiles. "And who might you be?" he asks, looking at Colbie.

The child looks at him. "Who are you?"

"Colbie," Beca chides her. "Let's not be rude."

"Sorry." Colbie looks down at the floor, draws patterns with her foot.

"It's fine," Jesse says, smiling. "I'm Jesse."

"Colbie. Colbie Mitchell-Beale."

Jesse nods. "Nice to meet you, Colbie."

"Nice to meet you, too, mister," Colbie says. "Beca and my mom are together. How do you know Beca and mom?"

Jesse grins with a twinkle in her eye. "I used to date your mom's partner..."

"Beca?" Colbie asks, surprised.

"Yep, I was Chloe's Beca's ex," Jesse confirms.

Colbie looks at Jesse for a second, before she makes a face and says, "Eeww."

Jesse laughs. "Yeah. That's my expression now too, when I think about that period in my life. Don't judge me."

Colbie giggles. "Okay. Did you know my name is my mom and Beca's name combined sort of?"

Jesse thinks about that for a second, "No, I did not know that..."

"Yeah and..." Colbie launches into a story about her name and as Jesse listens, Beca leans over to Fat Amy.

"Where is Colbie's dad-whatsisface again? Chloe's Teutonic boytoy?"

Fat Amy raises an eyebrow before she says, "Err, I forgot his real name - I think it was some vaguely Scandinavian sounding name that sounds like a sneeze...and we don't really speak of the sperm donor so much..."When Beca makes a face, Fat Amy quickly adds, "That's just what the Bellas call him. Chloe liked him okay, but not enough to like, bone him or anything...but you guys had some kind of huge fight or something after the tour and next thing we know she's knocked up..."

"Why'd they never marry or anything?"

Fat Amy glares at her in exasperation. "God, Beca, duh, you've got to be the dumbest person I know. What do you think? Also she wouldn't have run to him if it hadn't been for you so there's that..."

"What happened to him?"

"Afghanistan. Died on a tour of duty."

"Oh."

"Yeah. Although don't be too sorry. I mean he didn't die protecting democracy or freedom or some crazy ass shit like that. He died trying to take the perfect selfie."

"He literally died from a selfie?"

"No,he ignored his commander's orders to retreat, and something exploded."

"So he died from the explosion?"

"No, from the toilet bowl that landed on his face right after the explosion."

"Ah."

They fall silent, not knowing what else to say, before Beca asks, surveying the scene, the stage, the banner on top of the stage, the sound system, the musicians, her friends, the gathering audience and she takes a deep breath, says, "So everything's set?"

Fat Amy nods.

"Permits?"

Fat Amy says, "Check."

"Security?"

"Check." Fat Amy gestures to a group of tall, broad shouldered muscular men in tight-fitting shirts that say "Security."

"Sound system?"

"Check." Fat Amy points to the stage.

"Press?"

"Everyone's been contacted," Fat Amy says. "Indie mags, online and off. Even Gail Abernathy-McKadden and John Smith."

Beca looks to where Fat Amy points and she sees said ICCA commentators making themselves comfortable at the back of the shop. Beca cringes. "Nice. Good job. Performers?"

"All here...I hope..."

"Set list?"

Fat Amy nods. "Everyone's been given a copy. Sheet music distributed. They know what to do." Before Beca could ask another question, Fat Amy says, "And don't worry, she's coming, she's coming, don't get your panties all in a bunch. Your kids are taken care of, Davey's at the back sleeping, Colbie's around here somewhere." Fat Amy magically produces a megaphone and says, "Hey guys, has anyone seen Chloe's and Beca's kid? Colbie? About this high? Blond? Spunky looking kid?"

As if on cue, Colbie wanders over and says, "What's a set list?"

* * *

Colbie looks at the set list Beca has given her as they set up. Fat Amy's by the stage doing some introductions about the concert, how the concert is to save Imperium and music in general - while a box is being passed around for people to drop their cash in, vinyl records, paintings, pop bric-a-brac being sold to raise money.

Beca is in the middle of a lecture to Colbie. "The making of a set list is an art form. There are rules. First of all you're using other people's poetry to express yourself. You've gotta take it seriously and not screw it up."

Colbie nods, all serious. "Okay."

"The making of a great set list is hard and takes ages longer than it should to get the right songs together to impress the crowd..."

Beca's voice dies off as the door to the shop opens and she sees Chloe enter, wonder, confusion, curiosity on her face.

"...To impress mom?" Colbie asks.

Beca nods,distracted. "Yeah."

"To get her back?"

Beca grins and looks at Colbie. "You bet."

Beca sets to work on her station. "You gotta kick off with something to grab people's attention. Then take it up a notch, then cool it down a notch again. Anyway, there are a lot of rules."

Chloe finds her and Colbie by the stage. Their eyes lock.

"See. Everything I have done before is wrong and now I have to make it right."

"Okay," Colbie says. "Good luck."

* * *

Beca's started to make a set list for Chloe of all the things she likes, all the things that they were, all that they are now, all that they could be. She'd always believed life should be experienced and expressed musically.

She'd realized all this time that her past was blocking her. But the past is the answer to the future. And this journey she's gone through has been providing her answers.

She wonders if she's ever been happy or if she'll ever be happy. Maybe she was already happy and she just hadn't realized it. She'd always thought of happiness as a puzzle, something out of reach, but now she realizes it's her and how she'd consciously pushed it away.

She can see now she's always had a problem with commitment and intimacy. Always one foot out the door, preventing her from doing a lot of things, like thinking about her future, like finding happiness, like truly being with someone. It made more sense to commit to nothing, to keep her options open. And that's suicide. By tiny, tiny increments. There's a weight pressing on her chest and all she wants is to scoop Chloe in her arms and tell her how wrong Beca was but then the microphone makes a sound and she is brought to the present.

She sees Flo take her place, a chair in front, lead guitar and bass from Evermoist taking their positions behind, a drummer waiting patiently behind his equipment. Jessica, Ashley and Stacie take their place as backing vocals.

Fat Amy finishes up with her introductions, encourages everyone to donate, thanks those who came, acknowledges the presence of the Beales and then gives the microphone to Flo, Emily coming up from the side of the stage.

Flo smiles at all of them, greets everyone and nods to the musicians behind her and starts singing the chorus of Luis Fonsi's "Despacito":

 _Despacito_  
_Quiero respirar tu cuello despacito_  
_Deja que te diga cosas al oído_  
_Para que te acuerdes si no estás conmigo_

She then starts singing a stanza of the song

 _Sí, sabes que ya llevo un rato mirándote_  
_Tengo que bailar contigo hoy (DY)_  
_Vi que tu mirada ya estaba llamándome_  
_Muéstrame el camino que yo voy (Oh)_

 _Tú, tú eres el imán y yo soy el metal_  
_Me voy acercando y voy armando el plan_  
_Solo con pensarlo se acelera el pulso (Oh yeah)_

She nods to Emily and Emily grins and starts singing Camila Cabello's "Havana" to the delight and applause of the crowd gathered.

 _Havana, ooh na-na (ay)_  
_Half of my heart is in Havana, ooh-na-na (ay, ay)_  
_He took me back to East Atlanta, na-na-na_  
_Oh, but my heart is in Havana (ay)_  
_There's somethin' 'bout his manners (uh huh)_  
_Havana, ooh na-na (uh)_

They end with a duet of both songs as everyone starts singing, dancing and clapping to the songs. As the band continues to play, both Flo and Emily are joined by Stacie, Aubrey Fat Amy, Ashley, Lilly and Jessica as they start singing Fifth Harmony's "Work from Home"

 _You don't gotta go to work, work, work, work, work, work, work_  
_But you gotta put in work, work, work, work, work, work, work_  
_You don't gotta go to work, work, work, work, work, work, work_  
_Let my body do the work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work_  
_We can work from home, oh, oh, oh oh_  
_We can work from home, oh, oh, oh oh_

Then Jesse comes on and with Flo, Emily, Stacie, Aubrey, Fat Amy, Ashley, Jessica serving as back-up vocals, he starts to sing Justin Timberlake song, "I've Got This Feeling"

 _I got this feelin' inside my bones_  
_It goes electric, wavy when I turn it on_  
_All through my city, all through my home_  
_We're flyin' up, no ceilin', when we in our zone_

 _I got that sunshine in my pocket_  
_Got that good soul in my feet_  
_I feel that hot blood in my body when it drops (ooh)_  
_I can't take my eyes up off it, movin' so phenomenally_  
_Room on lock, the way we rock it, so don't stop_

And as the crowd thunders in applause, Bumper comes on singing Maroon's Sugar, along with the rest of the Trebles,

 _I'm hurting, baby, I'm broken down_  
_I need your loving, loving, I need it now_  
_When I'm without you_  
_I'm something weak_  
_You got me begging_  
_Begging, I'm on my knees_

 _I don't wanna be needing your love_  
_I just wanna be deep in your love_  
_And it's killing me when you're away_  
_Ooh, baby,_  
_'Cause I really don't care where you are_  
_I just wanna be there where you are_  
_And I gotta get one little taste_

Jesse responds with

 _And under the lights when everything goes_  
_Nowhere to hide when I'm gettin' you close_  
_When we move, well, you already know_  
_So just imagine, just imagine, just imagine_

and then both Jesse and Bumper start singing

 _Your sugar_  
_Yes, please_  
_Won't you come and put it down on me_  
_I'm right here, 'cause I need_  
_Little love and little sympathy_  
_Yeah you show me good loving_  
_Make it alright_  
_Need a little sweetness in my life_  
_Your sugar_  
_Yes, please_  
_Won't you come and put it down on me_

While the ladies sing the rest of the lyrics for "I've got this Feeling"

 _Nothin' I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance_  
_Feel a good, good creepin' up on you_  
_So just dance, dance, dance, come on_  
_All those things I shouldn't do_  
_But you dance, dance, dance_  
_And ain't…_

and Jesse sings _, "I want something just like this"_ and the Trebles sing

_Pull me closer in the backseat of your Rover_

_That I know you can't afford_  
_Bite that tattoo on your shoulder_  
_Pull the sheets right off the corner_  
_Of the mattress that you stole_  
_From your roommate back in Boulder_

And the Bellas, Trebles, Evermoist start singing,

_We ain't ever getting older_

_We ain't ever getting older_  
_We ain't ever getting older_

The crowd goes wild, cheers the Bellas and Trebles on stage, people are throwing their arms up in the air, clapping and singing along to the songs.

Then as everyone finishes singing, the music fades, the lights dim, a hush falls on the crowd as if something is about to happen, all the singers hang back as one lone person comes up on stage. A melody is played on keyboards, the familiar strains of a song, a song no one has heard in a while, a song they once song in a pool back in college, right before the championships, an unforgettable song and then Cynthia Rose comes on singing

 _Oh, her eyes, her eyes make the stars look like they're not shinin'_  
_Her hair, her hair falls perfectly without her trying_  
_She's so beautiful and I tell her everyday_  
_Yeah, I know, I know when I compliment her she won't believe me_  
_And it's so, it's so sad to think that she don't see what I see_  
_But every time she asks me "Do I look okay?"_  
_I say_

Then Beca appears with a microphone in hand singing Ed Sheeran's "Perfect" as the others continue to hum Bruno Mars' "Just the Way You Are"

 _I found a love for me_  
_Darling just dive right in_  
_And follow my lead_  
_Well I found a girl beautiful and sweet_  
_I never knew you were the someone waiting for me_  
_'Cause we were just kids when we fell in love_

 _Not knowing what it was_  
_I will not give you up this time_  
_But darling, just kiss me slow, your heart is all I own_  
_And in your eyes you're holding mine_

 _Baby, I'm dancing in the dark with you between my arms_  
_Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song_  
_When you said you looked a mess, I whispered underneath my breath_  
_But you heard it, darling, you look perfect tonight_

Then Cynthia Rose sings the chorus with Beca, to cheers and applause from the crowd

 _When I see your face_  
_There's not a thing that I would change 'cause you're amazing_  
_Just the way you are_  
_And when you smile_  
_The whole world stops and stares for a while_  
_'Cause girl you're amazing_  
_Just the way you are_  
_Yeah_

Then Cynthia Rose sings

 _Well I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know_  
_She shares my dreams, I hope that someday I'll share her home_  
_I found a love, to carry more than just my secrets_  
_To carry love, to carry children of our own_  
_We are still kids, but we're so in love_  
_Fighting against all odds_  
_I know we'll be alright this time_  
_Darling, just hold my hand_  
_Be my girl, I'll be your man_  
_I see my future in your eyes_

Then Emily comes forward and sings Meghan Trainor's "Like I'm Gonna Lose You"

 _So I'm gonna love you like I'm gonna lose you_  
_And I'm gonna hold you like I'm saying goodbye_  
_Wherever we're standing_  
_I won't take you for granted_  
_'Cause we'll never know when, when we'll run out of time_

And Flo, Jessica and Ashley sing Alicia Key's "No One"

 _No one, no one, no one_  
_Can get in the way of what I'm feeling_  
_No one, no one, no one_  
_Can get in the way of what I feel for you, you, you_  
_Can get in the way of what I feel for you_

Emily joins in by singing

 _I got all I need when I got you and I_  
_I look around me, and see a sweet life_  
_I'm stuck in the dark but you're my flashlight_  
_You're getting me, getting me through the night_

 _'Cause you're my flashlight (flashlight)_  
_You're my flashlight (flashlight)_  
_You're my flashlight_

And as Beca and Cynthia Rose continue singing, the others join them, everyone harmonizing perfectly, rising as one, singing the song as if it were a hymn, or an offering, or a promise, a quiet declaration of love, Beca's own very public, very sincere declaration of what she wants to tell Chloe, all the things she's ever wanted to say but couldn't, all the things she's wanted to express but could not.

 _Baby, I'm dancing in the dark, with you between my arms_  
_Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song_  
_When I saw you in that dress, looking so beautiful_  
_I don't deserve this, darling, you look perfect tonight_

When the song fades, a stillness grips the store, no one saying or doing anything. Everyone is just looking up at the singers onstage, quiet, in awe, speechless. Beca could see some are about to cry. She doesn't notice any of them though, doesn't hear even the small sniffle from out of the crowd. All she could see is Chloe, Chloe amongst the crowd, at the back, looking at her, not applauding, still and silent. Chloe holds her gaze for what seems like a very long, long time.

Then out of the silence, Beca hears one person slowly clap, and then another, and another, until it's one thunderous, avalanche of applause and Jesse and Bumper, Fat Amy and Emily and the rest of the former acapella singers yell out whoops of joy. Calamity, at the back, grins, and then the band launches into another song, this time by Taylor Swift, and then the Bellas, then the Trebles start singing to the song.

Beca doesn't notice all of that, though. She leaves Colbie, who has been listening in rapt attention to her and the rest of the singers, by Fat Amy, hops down the stage, and makes her way down the crowd. People right and left are giving her high fives and congratulations and telling her how awesome the show is thus far, people dance and jostle and push her but she ignores all that, tries to clear a path to Chloe because all she wants to do is get to Chloe. Chloe, who stands rigid and silent by the back of the shop, who, when Beca finally gets there, turns, opens the door and steps out into the cold of the night.

"Chloe..."

Chloe stops, turns around, shivering, looking at her.

"Don't leave, please," Beca pleads, "I know staging a concert and singing a bunch of songs, is lame, but I've always been bad with feelings and processing feelings and this was just a way for me to tell you how sorry I am for everything...everything I did wrong, all the times I hurt, all the times I should have done something right but I didn't...I'm sorry For the times I hurt you, for the times I lied to you, and for every other reason you're so angry at me. I know my apologies don't mean shit to you, but aside from that, all I can do is promise to try to be better in the future, if there is a future..."

When Chloe still doesn't say anything, Beca quickly adds, "It's just...I've realized so many things these past few days, but one of the things I've realized is...you just make me want to be better. You make me feel like I'm home, like I'm exactly where I want to be. I love you without knowing how, why, or even from where."

Chloe just stands there, not saying anything. Beca looks at her, feeling the despair and rejection and failure of her efforts. She has failed. She has failed again. So she shakes her head and mutters, "God that was stupid, really stupid, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have..." She sighs and turns around, turns back to the store.

But then Chloe speaks up.

"We are terrible for each other," Chloe declares.

Beca stops, and turns. She looks at Chloe, doesn't say anything. But then Chloe gives her a small smile. "We are," Beca agrees, and returns her smile. "I love you, though. It's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I love you. More than anyone ever could, and I swear, if you could give me a chance, I will spend the rest of my life making this up to you if you just let me."

The smile on Chloe's face grows wider and the sparkle in her eyes come back. There's a glint of hope there that takes Beca's breath away.

"Do you mean that?" Chloe asks in a whisper, uncertain and hopeful.

Beca is nodding even before Chloe finishes the question. "Yes," she says. "A million times yes," she says.

Chloe doesn't even let her finish. Chloe rushes up to her, holds her and kisses her.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Pitch Perfect 2 and 3 is the reason why this chap and the whole story itself exists, because both left a lot to be desired and the characters, esp. Bechloe, were not given stories that they deserved. This story does not aim to fix that but here's hoping you enjoyed it anyway. Anyway, hope you like. This chap best read with the music featured in the story (it's a movie musical, so). Comments welcome, thanks and happy reading!


	9. 9

Chapter 9

Later, Fat Amy would tell Beca that the concert was a success, that they were able to raise enough money for Imperium, that the store could stay open, that even as she speaks, the plans they have, of innovating, of making things a bit better, are gaining traction, that Taylor Beale has their full support and cooperation. The store, and at least its legacy gets a reprieve, will be around for little awhile at least. Taylor Beale looks at Beca with what seems like newfound respect.

The concert had been a success in a different way, old college friends being able to reconnect, network, exchange numbers, think about collaborations and projects. Das Sound Machine and Evermoist have both invited Fat Amy to be a guest singer for their act ("On condition I don't call myself 'Obesity'," Fat Amy says with a grin.). Gail Abernathy-McKadden and John Smith seem to have grown soft in their old age, leaving nostalgic reviews of the concert, saying "We didn't know if it was as necessary as a root canal, but like wine, the Bellas and Trebles seem to have aged well and seem to be getting better with age" although they did mention that the ones playing guitar for Evermoist seemed to play like there were sausages strapped to their fingers.

Beca doesn't notice all of this though. The whole night of the concert she is by Chloe's side, never leaving her and Colbie and Davey except to perform with their friends. Hands entwined, they watch as friends, former rivals and acquaintances perform for the audience. Chloe joins them a couple of times, Colbie holding her hand as she sings songs with the Bellas. Her voice is raspy and old from disuse, from not having sung for awhile, but when she sings, Beca sees no one else but her and when she sings she feels like her heart will explode.

* * *

After the concert, when all their goodbyes have been said and everything has been closed, and everyone has gone home and been put to bed, Beca takes Chloe to bed.

They take each other's clothes off silently, carefully, as if opening a present for the first time, as if they have just discovered each other for the first time. They kiss and kiss and kiss, running their hands all over each other until they are wrapped in each other's arms, entwined and breathless. The world, the present, everything that's happened, all possibilities melt away and it is just the two of them. They roll and roll around the soft, warm bed til Beca hears Chloe start moaning and moving more urgently and clutching her like a lifeline and her breath hitches and there are a few whispered words of pleasure.

Beca watches Chloe coming, watches her move beneath her, eyes closed, and when she reaches her peak, there is a sensation of total quiet, of everything stopping, and Beca realizes her heart is beating so fast, beating as fast as Chloe's and she feels her warm and soft and hers. She stares at Chloe's face, perfect and lovely in the moonlight and she wants to feel all the feelings. There are so many conflicted feelings that she's afraid to feel them all.

She hears a sound, of something chiming, a bell ringing, sees shadows playing on the walls, hears the branches scratch against the window. In an instant she realizes this could be the last time she'd ever be with Chloe, that she could wake up any minute and find herself in her old life, with no Chloe, and no family. She feels the pain stab her heart, feels it plunging down her gut and she feels like crying, so she closes her eyes and buries her face in Chloe's neck and she whispers "I love you" instead to which Chloe's ready and genuine response is a simple "I love you, too" too.

After, when Chloe is naked and sleep on their bed, sated and dreaming, she goes to their children's rooms, watches Colbie and Davey sleep, kisses them both softly. She goes down to the kitchen, running a hand on the walls, on the table, as if memorizing the place. She takes a drink of water and stands in the kitchen, dread and anxiety creeping in her, wishing the night would never end, wishing this would ever end.

* * *

She gets a reprieve.

She doesn't know when she will wake up or return, but she spends all of it with her family, reveling in the mundane, enjoying the simple things - dropping off and picking the kids up at school, preparing them their dinners, giving them their baths, putting them to bed, telling them stories, singing them to sleep. And Chloe - taking her to expensive dinners they cannot afford, going out on date nights, holding her as if it were their last night together or the end of the world.

* * *

Once, playing in the snow, Colbie suddenly hugs her and says, voice cryptic and strange, "I knew you'd come back."

Beca doesn't know what to say to that, so she just hugs the child back. But then the child says,"But in case it's still you, Beca, here." And she reaches into her pocket and produces a bracelet.

"What's this?" Beca asks, regarding the necklace curiously. It's small and it has pink, small blocks with the each letter of Colbie's name in each box, joined together by black string.

"It's my baby bracelet, mommy gave it to you or other you, before I was born. It's supposed to mean a lot to mommy," Colbie explains. "I think you couldn't afford a ring so mommy gave this to you and you told mommy you'd get a real ring once you can afford it and return it."

"Are you sure?" Beca asks. "This seems to mean a lot to you..."

Colbie nods. "It's ok. You can keep it. To remember me by."

Beca tries not to cry. So the kid senses something, too.

Colbie leans over and whispers on her ear, "You can give it back when you find your way back to us."

Beca nods, closing her fist on the bracelet. Wordlessly, she hugs the child as tightly as she could. She tries hard to blink back the tears.

* * *

It had been a pretty ordinary but good day, Beca thinks all in all, she's gotten the hang of being a family person. She finds that this life is good, that she goes to bed each day feeling thankful and fulfilled.

That night she listens to Colbie's stories of school, Chloe's stories of work, and they laugh and joke and Chloe and Beca can't seem to take their eyes or hands off of each other.

Beca goes to bed holding Chloe in her arms. She thinks every day should end with Chloe in her arms.

* * *

The alarm sounds for seven thirty.

Beca stays in bed, not wanting to open her eyes.

There is an eerie stillness, a quiet in the room, and absence of a chill, a different smell - smell of wood and oak and air freshner and Downy - a very anti-septic smell.

For a few moments she thinks the bedsheets are going to rustle, someone's going to groan and roll over, reach out for her and hold her, another one's going to bound up the bed and jump up and down, a baby's going to be screaming and other assorted noises and smells will assault her senses.

When none of that is forthcoming, she opens her eyes and looks around. The room is wide, very bright, surrounded by large windows, and empty and quiet but for her. She thinks maybe she's dreaming but as she gets up, goes over her empty house, its studio, its kitchen with its gluten-free food and kale and corn, its living room, and looks out of the windows, at the palm trees and manicured lawn and blue skies, she realizes, with a sinking feeling, that she is back in her real life, in L.A., with no Colbie, no Davey and no Chloe.

As this realization sinks in, she stumbles around the house, almost in tears.

Colbie. Davey. Chloe. Gone. All gone.

She sits down by the stairs, puts her head in her hands and cries.


	10. 10

Chapter 10

Beca feels lost, dazed, complete and utterly  _alone_.

She drives around L.A., sees people walking around and every single one of them has that very L.A. very shiny, scrubbed but undernourished look. She looks at herself in the mirror and she feels the same.

She feels like an eternity has passed but in reality it's only been awhile. Out east the change in seasons indicate the passage of time whereas in L.A. time seems to not pass at all, it's the same season all the time, all year round and so it feels like she's stuck in something she can't get out of.

After Chloe and New Jersey, she sees L.A.,as if she's only seeing this city for the first time. L.A. feels phony, unreal, insubstantial, as if it's about to be swept away or swallowed up by the ocean.

She feels insubstantial herself. Empty. Useless.

She goes to the recording studio and realizes that all the things she knows are useless. Bill tells her a career that makes her loads of money couldn't be all that useless, but what is the point of all that money if there's nobody to share it with? Meaningless. That's what everything feels like. Meaningless.

She wishes she could unwrite her life. She wishes she could dematerialize and reconstitute herself as another Beca, the Beca that chose Chloe all those years ago. She feels this gaping hole in the center of her life where Chloe is supposed to go and it's tearing her apart.

She gets drunk one night, looks up hers and Chloe's New Jersey address in the phonebook and is surprised that it is listed. With clammy fingers she dials the number, only to be rudely answered by a belligerent, annoyed old man's voice. She googles the address after and there's an image but it isn't the same house or the same driveway, and it doesn't have the holiday figures Chloe insisted they put up (the Christmas wreath on the door, Santa Claus and his reindeer by the side of the driveway, elves by the windows). She googles the day care and kindergarten where she had dropped off Colbie and Davey, but they are private Montessori schools for grade school children. She googles the zoo where Chloe works but as she scrolls down the list of staff, she already knows, with growing despair, that she isn't there. With a little hope left in her heart she googles Imperium Records, on the street where the store was but no such shop exists on the street, just a building that has a sign with "Empire" written on it.

She attempts to check Chloe Beale out on facebook, which she should have done in the first place, but she's afraid of what she will find. When she finally finds the courage to do so she finds a few Chloes, but no Chloe Beale. Chloe has no facebook. She distinctly remembers Chloe having one in college but Beca thinks she may have deactivated it.

She wants to call up Barden's Alumni Office to ask around about Chloe but it's been almost a few years since college and she didn't really graduate so she's not really registered with the office and she doesn't know about calling her father and having to deal with him and her stepmother.

On a whim she takes the next flight to New Jersey, lands at Newark and tries to find the street. After a few tries, she finally finds the place via GPS but the picture on google and the actual one are the same. She stays long enough to just look at the house til an old man, suspicious and wary, comes out to ask if he can help her. When she says she's looking for Chloe Beale, the man confusedly says,"I'm sorry, there's no one by that name living here."

She apologizes, thanks the man and leaves.

As the days wear on, and as her search turns futile, she feels a small element of doubt creep in. That dream, or whatever it was, had been so vivid, so  _real_ , how could it be anything but real? Had someone or  _something_  played a trick on her, her subconscious? The cosmos? The universe? It has been so extraordinary that she has started to believe against all reason that they are meant to be. Has convinced herself that they are destined to be together.

She realizes maybe she's being unreasonable and ridiculous.

There is no such thing as destiny. Or fate. Only randomness and disorder.

She successfully convinces herself of this and reluctantly slides back into her life.

* * *

She could have forgotten all about it, Chloe, Colbie, Davey and the dream of a nice, comfortable, lovely life with the woman she loves.

But then everytime she goes out, every redhead she sees makes her heart skip a beat. Once, while waiting for the red light turn green, she'd spotted a redhead in a bright green floral dress and wedges and she'd actually found herself following the girl, double parking the car by some street and running after the girl, til the girl is swallowed by the holiday crowd and all she is left with is a parking ticket, disappointment, despair and an aching longing for a woman she hadn't seen in a long time.

Every couple she sees with two children could be her and Chloe and the kids, every toy or dress she sees at a window could be something she could buy for Davey or Colbie. She does her groceries and remembers that Colbie loves gummy bears and cookies and chocolates even though it's not allowed and that she used to buy Davey's diapers and milk. Used to. She shakes her head. She refers to that period in her life as if it actually happened. She has to remind herself it was just a dream. But god, why couldn't it be real? Even if it just happened in her head? Does it make it less real?

She passes by restaurants she wishes she could take Chloe out on dinner dates to, sees movies that maybe they could watch together, looks out to the sea and dreams of walking down the beach, holding Chloe's hand, and Chloe looking at her like she's the only person that existed in the world. Because that's how Chloe looked at her most of the time anyway.

She'd have given up but then she comes across the note left by the housekeeper, Maria, the call from Chloe. The note had gotten lost in sheet music and notes and contracts. She wants to kick herself. She turns it over and there's a barely decipherable phone number scribbled there. She's annoyed at Rosa, then at herself for not noticing it sooner.

She quickly calls the number with a pounding heart and for a few seconds the phone on the other line just rings and rings before it goes to voicemail and she hears Chloe's voice, upbeat, enthusiastic, happy, asking her to leave a message. She thinks she might just pass out after hearing her voice. She hadn't known how much she'd missed Chloe until she'd heard her voice. She almost feels like crying.

She leaves her message and waits for Chloe to call her back, hopeful and afraid at the same time.

* * *

There is no response or call from Chloe for days and days. At first Beca fiercely watches her phone, doesn't let it leave her side, but then it occurs to her that maybe Chloe had forgotten her, forgotten she'd even called her and left a message, and so Beca resolves to forget her, to get back to her life, of making music for pop star and other famous musicians, to receiving checks and attending parties and meetings and shutting herself away in her studio making music.

But each time though, she realizes how mundane, how  _ordinary_ , her life is now. How  _boring_  her life is. How lonely. In contrast, she feels like the glimpse of her life with Chloe, the wonder and amazement she feels at being responsible for not just one but three human beings and realizing she's good at it, surprises her. It's different. It's  _extraordinary_.

And how could one really forget Chloe anyway? She closes her eyes and she sees her. She goes to sleep and she dreams of her, wavy, red hair and blue eyes haunting her dreams. Sometimes, while at the studio or at yet another meeting she'd find herself staring off into space, prompting Bill to snap fingers at her and once, telling her, "What's with you today?"

Then suddenly, one night, out of the blue, she checks her voice mail and there's a puzzled Chloe, returning her call,telling her,"This is gonna sound weird but I don't remember calling you...but it's a nice surprise to hear from you. Listen, I'm gonna be in L.A. for a conference, maybe when you're free we could meet for coffee?" There is a long,awkward pause before Chloe decides maybe the message is enough and then she says goodbye and hangs up.

Beca doesn't realize until after the call has ended how much her heart was pounding.

* * *

She'd debated long and hard about whether to call or text - she didn't want to seem overeager, but she didn't want to seem too nonchalant as to seem not to care. But she didn't know how she would react to hearing Chloe's voice on the other end. She would probably either throw up Aubrey Posen style or die.

She leaves a text message instead.

* * *

Beca stands at the airport, waiting for Chloe.

Chloe had some kind of emergency or other and so she has to cut her trip and the conference short. She'd left a hasty message about having to take the next flight out to somewhere - Beca doesn't remember where - but they could meet at the airport if she wanted.

Now, standing at the airport, Beca again considers the very real possibility that she might either throw up or faint at the sight of Chloe Beale.

She waits for what seems like hours, growing anxious and nervous. She feels the doubt settle in. What was she thinking? She shouldn't have come. This was stupid. Chloe might be a nice person, but even nice persons have an unpredictable streak that she finds scary. What if she's still angry at her? Upset? Annoyed?

But at the same time she feels unsettled by the possible sighting, an indefinable excitement at seeing Chloe again, for real this time.

She cranes her neck, watches out for every redhead approaching, afraid she might miss her.

She shouldn't have worried.

You can't really miss Chloe Beale in a crowd, with her flurry of luscious,wavy red hair, her blue eyes, her lovely face, looking, if that were even possible, even more beautiful than ever, gliding down the airport in high boots, tight tight skinny jeans, a blouse that accentuated all her curves and the same gentle smile on her face. She is still as physically flawless as the day she first met her, a gorgeous specimen in a sexy outfit.

The moment she sees Chloe, she feels an increase in her heart rate, that familiar feeling one gets when one sees an old lover years afterward. Even if it feels like an ordinary event, she feels a thrill, like an important event has just happened.

Beca stares at Chloe, making her way to the crowd. She can't get enough of her. Drinks her in. Wishes the moment would never end. But then Chloe spots her and she smiles and Beca feels like her heart has just been wrenched away from her chest and she can't breathe.

When she finally comes up to Beca, impossibly close, as she is fond of doing, she smiles even more and says, without preamble, as if they were just continuing a conversation that had just been cut short, "So, what did you want to see me about?"

At first, Beca's brain feels like it's going to short circuit. She hasn't been this near Chloe since college. But she can smell lavender and rose and chamomile.

At first, Beca doesn't know what to say. She is distracted by the nearness of Chloe and her own flustered, flushed state.

But then when she does, she starts with, "I dunno, you called me..."

Chloe smiles. "But I didn't," she insists. "I told you."

So Beca digs into her pocket, produces the note and says,"But I had this note, from my housekeeper, a call from you from Christmas eve..."

Chloe is still shaking her head, "Nope, I didn't call you that night. Or any night for that matter."

When Beca's face falls, Chloe quickly adds, "I was with Fat Amy and Aubrey and some of the others, we were having a little get-together and reminiscing about the old times." Chloe smiles at the thought. "And the topic led to you and how Fat Amy wanted you to come but it was hard to get hold of you because you're a bigshot now, and how it might get a bit aca-awkward and I asked why and Fat Amy told me it was because of what went down with us..."

Chloe waits a beat for this before she continues, "But then I remember telling her this one time when I dreamed of you...and how it was very strange because in the dream we were married and had kids and stuff..."

"What?"

"Yeah, I know it's stupid and lame and..." Chloe rambles now, smiling sheepishly. "Anyway, what do you want to talk about? Why the phonecall?"

Now that Chloe is here, Beca feels shy and tongue-tied, doesn't know what to say, but she gulps and starts with a shrug.

"I don't know. I wanted to see you, I guess, talk about the old days," Beca says.

Chloe rolls her eyes. "We're not that old. So are you really a music producer now?"

Beca nods. "Among other things. You?"

"Vet."

"Oh."

"Yeah. I know," Chloe makes a face. "I've got my hand stuck up a lot of animal asses more than I can count. But it's kinda awesome and strangely enough I kinda love it? After you left, I kinda decided to finally graduate."

"I thought the Bellas meant the world to you."

"They did," Chloe acknowledges, "But I also had to face the fact that I had to face the real world, too. That sooner or later I'd have to go out into the world and make my own way. The Bellas, college was comfortable. But it wasn't real life. And I had to leave if I wanted my life to begin. I had you to thank for that." Chloe lets this sink in before she continues. "After you left, that made me start thinking about my own life, too, about the things I did so I could stay in school and then I decided maybe I should try  _not_  failing, for once. Afterall, like you said, life isn't just all about the Bellas and acapella."

"You know you shouldn't listen to me all the time," Beca says. "I'm an idiot."

Chloe laughs out loud. "I know. But you're an adorable idiot, so there's that."

Beca blushes at Chloe's easy compliment.

Chloe doesn't seem to notice though as she continues, "I've gotta say, I have to thank you for that. Without that, I wouldn't have had the wake-up call I needed." She smiles at Beca.

Beca feels like her heart is going to break. There's no indication at all that Chloe bears any hard feelings against her. She doesn't seem upset or angry. But more than that, what's making her sad is the fact that Chloe doesn't seem to indicate any feelings at all for her. Like she's indifferent. She'd read somewhere that the opposite of love isn't hate at all, but indifference. She looks at Chloe and realizes, with a sinking feeling, that it is right.

She manages to say, "That's great, I guess."

The PA system announces arrivals and departures over the sound system. Chloe looks up, listens, checks her watch, realizes she has to go, so she says, "Um, hey, I really want to stay, but I've got a flight to catch, maybe we can do this some other time?"

The voice over the PA system speaks again, so Chloe looks a bit more anxious. "I'm sorry, I think I've  _really_  got to go..."

Beca panics as Chloe gets ready to go, so she says, "Listen, um, this is going to sound really crazy, I don't really know what I'm doing here but..."

"Yeah...?" Chloe prompts her, not really paying attention.

"Um, back in college, before I left...I was kind of wondering about that little argument we had...?"

"What argument?" Chloe asks, knitting her eyebrows.

Beca shrugs, already feeling ridiculous, "We had that argument before I left and..."

"Okay..."

"And I don't know..." Beca says, unsure, hesitating.

Chloe sighs and rolls her eyes. "I don't have all day, nerd, hurry up."

"Okay, okay," Beca says. She draws a deep breath, closes her eyes and says, "I guess, I wanted some, I don't know, confirmation? whatever...but...back in college, did we..."

"What?"

"You know..." Beca says, making a face and squirming, clearly uncomfortable.

"No, I don't know," Chloe says, confused. When Beca doesn't say anything, Chloe half-laughs and says, "Beca, what's wrong? Are you okay? You're looking a little weird..."

"Was there something going on between us in college?" Beca says quickly, all in one breath, as if she wants to get it over with. "I don't know and I'm not entirely sure, but..."

Chloe just looks at her, not knowing what to say. Finally, she says, "I'm sorry, I'm not sure if I heard you correctly..."

"I'm sorry, it's just," Beca wrings her hands. "I could swear there was something between us...or there could have been, except I was a stupid ass, so..."

"Beca..." Chloe says, softly. "What do you want me to say...? Are you in some kind of mid-life crisis? Do you want some closure or something? Although that would mean we would have had something in the first place..."

The voice over the PA system speaks again so Chloe says, "Look, I've gotta go..."

But as she turns, Beca says, desperate, feeling like Chloe is slipping through her fingers, "We have a house, over in New Jersey, it isn't much and it isn't big, but it's ours...we're going to have to pay for it for the rest of our lives, but after a few more payments, it's going to be ours..."

Chloe turns around, looking at Beca, puzzled. "What...?"

"We have a family, two kids - Colbie and Davey. They both have your eyes and they're both gorgeous. I mean, they're unbelievably gorgeous, it's ridiculous. Colbie is five, blond, about this high, she looks like you, and she's got your eyes, and she's beautiful. She's a little precocious and she talks like a grown-up most of the time, but that's probably because you've raised her well. She's wonderful and really smart and she doesn't take shit from anyone, including me," Beca continues. "And Davey - Davey's a few months old, but he's cute and naughty and playful and all I want to do is hold him forever." Chloe wants to say some more, but Beca doesn't let her interrupt. She says, "And you, you're a zookeeper. Yeah, I know, I know, I thought it was crazy, too, but you love it. I don't think it pays enough but you don't mind and you don't care. I'm a record store manager, and it probably doesn't pay as much, too, but the hours are decent and I'm surrounded by friends and music all the time, and I think it's awesome. Strangely enough, I think it's awesome."

As Chloe stares at her, Beca takes a few steps toward her, carefully, not wanting her to run away. "And we're in love. So fucking in love. Like, I can't even begin to describe how much in love. We're in love and we're happy. We've gone through some good times and some bad times and it's been rough, but we've gotten to the point, after five years, where we can work things out, despite everything, because we've been through so much and we don't want to throw all of that away. And when you look at me, it's like, no one else exists but me, like there's no one else you'd rather be with in the whole wide world than me... and me - I was a jerk for a long time, but after some time, I realized how much the world is better because of you, how I'm better because of you, how your love has changed me. It's lame I know, and I don't even understand what it all means...but it felt real, and it showed me what life could be, what life should be, what it could become if we were together. And I know you think it's stupid and who leaves their fate in the hands of a stupid dream right?"

When Chloe doesn't speak, Beca rushes into the next one, desperate and unsure. "And I know that you think of me as just a friend, and crossing that line is the last thing from your mind. But I had to say it. I can't look into your eyes without feeling that longing you only read about in shitty romance novels. And I know this will probably ruin our friendship or whatever but I had to say it, 'cause I've never felt this way before, and I don't care. I like who I am because of it. And if bringing this to light means you'll never talk to me again, then that hurts me. But God, I just, I couldn't allow another day to go by without just getting it out there, regardless of what happens after, which by the look on your face is to be the inevitable rejection. And, you know, I'll accept that. But I hope that some part of you is hesitating for a moment, and if there's a moment of hesitation, then that means you feel something too. And all I ask, please, is that you just -  _not_  dismiss that, and try to dwell in it for just ten seconds. Chloe, there isn't another soul on this fucking planet I want to be with and I would risk this friendship for the chance to take it to the next level. Because it is there between you and me. Or it was. You can't deny that. Even if, you know, even if we never talk again after today, please know that I am forever changed because of who you are and what you've meant to me and I couldn't live another day without at least letting you know."

Chloe stands there, not saying anything, her normally expressive face expressionless, regarding Beca silently. Beca looks down, wants the floor to open up and swallow her up. But Chloe isn't leaving, so she feels hopeful.

"Wow, that's like, a very impressive speech," Chloe says now.

Beca looks up and there's a hint of a twinkle in Chloe's eye.

"Shut up," Beca says, embarassed.

"Yeah, like, that's the longest speech you've ever made to anyone, without dying," Chloe teases her.

Beca flushes. "Fine, whatever, if this is just a joke to you then I'm just gonna leave now..."

She turns around and makes to leave, but Chloe stops her and says, "Wait, don't go..."

When she stops, she tries to avoid Chloe's gaze, but Chloe is looking at her intently. "Did you really mean all that?"

"Ehm...I'm standing in front of you, literally dying,  _literally,_  so," Beca says.

Chloe smiles. "I don't know about all of that though. We haven't seen each other in a long time...and it seems weird to see you now and have you say all of that...it feels a bit too little too late..."

"Better late than never, right?" Beca says, hopeful. "C'mon, just one coffee. After that, if you don't want to see me again, it's fine, I'll accept that..."

Chloe is seems to be debating something with herself. When she speaks, Beca, against her will, grows even more hopeful.

"...I failed Russian Literature..."

"What?"

"Russian Litt, first semester."

"Yes, I know, I was there," Beca says.

"But I didn't have to," Chloe says.

"Yeah...?" Beca says, "Your point being..."

Chloe grins. "You're a bit dense sometimes, do you know that? Let me spell it out for you..." She comes closer. "I failed Russian Literature even if I didn't have to. You were invited to the Bellas even though you were too alternative for Aubrey's taste, I made sure of that, I made the other Bellas wait up for you when you were in jail, I supported your ideas even if it meant really massive fights with Aubrey...I..." As Chloe speaks, Beca realizes what Chloe is saying. "Do you want me to go on...?"

Beca is grinning even before Chloe could finish her question. Chloe continues to enumerate, and by the end of her speech, Beca is grinning from ear to ear. "So, I guess, to answer your question about whether there's something on between us or not...what do you think? Surely you could do the math on that one."

Beca lets out a deep breath she didn't know she was holding and a slow smile spreads on her face.

"I don't know where this is going, and I don't want to jump in just because you just appeared out of nowhere with a speech like that but..." and here Chloe smiles the gentlest smiles that could melt Beca's heart, "I'd like to try. Over coffee."

"You're going to miss your flight."

Chloe shrugs. "I guess your worth it."

Beca feels, right then and there, like she wants to shout and jump for joy. Like the sun had just risen and there's hope in the horizon. She feels like her heart is going to burst that she might die.

Chloe reaches out her hand and motions for Beca to follow her. As Chloe hooks her hand to Beca's arm, she says, with a smile, "So, tell me more about this dream..."

Beca feels shy all of a sudden. "I don't really know if it's a dream...? It seemed very real..."

"So, what happened to Other Beca...?"

Beca shrugs. "I like to think she came into  _my_  life here and realized how empty and meaningless it was without you."

Chloe grins. "Keep talking like that and some day you might just get lucky."

Beca grins back. "I'd like that."

Chloe's hand slides into Beca's, she leans into Beca a bit and they walk out of the airport and into a bright, new day...

\- end -

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So, that's it for this story. Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. If you recognize the movies referenced/borrowed for this story, or if you liked this fic, feel free to leave a comment. Thank you for reading!


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